*This fanfic is underneath my folder titled “Creepypasta stuff”. Gacha Club character designs are under this forum: https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/viewtopic.php?f=27&t=116005&start=1260. Laughing Jack and Jason the Toymaker are not my OCs. They are in the Creepypasta fandom. Aeliana is my OC. Enjoy!*
Laughing Jack stepped softly throughout the toy shop, careful not to wake Jason up. His beloved slept softly on the white bed in the toy shop, his long, red hair splayed beautifully over his stitched, slightly rotting face. It was a long day of tricking a child for LJ and the last thing he wanted was to disturb Jason and-
His striped, stretchy arm accidentally knocked over a doll. Though Laughing Jack did not have a heart, he could feel the strings that served as his heart racing as he reached out to grab the doll before it hit the ground…
“Jack? You’re home.”
Laughing Jack mentally cursed himself as he put the doll back on the shelf. He could save the doll from falling but he could not be graceful enough to stop it from falling in the first place.
“Yes. I apologize for waking you up, I didn’t mean-“
“It’s fine. How was it? Does she still trust you?”
Jason asked the question casually, but Laughing Jack knew him well enough to know that he was anything but casual. He could see the fire dancing in his green eyes. It was only a day after he had spoken to Aeliana but already, Jason was impatient. He wanted the girl’s soul for the doll and he wanted it soon.
But such things could not be rushed.
“Of course she does. I promise, I will kill her. I just need a few more months.”
Jason smiled at him, but Laughing Jack could tell that he was still not content. It was not easy for him to be content, but that was okay.
It’d all be okay.
“I admire your ambition, but please don’t let it take over you. Go to sleep. I will watch over you.”
And as Jason lay back down on the bed, Laughing Jack crawled up towards the ceiling with the dolls that hang on strings, hanging with him when he was on top, eyes wide open, awake and asleep, doing just what he said he would.
He always kept his word.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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These connect to this:
When Jason the Toymaker met Laughing Jack
Laughing Jack’s surprise for Jason the Toymaker
Laughing Jack and Jason the Toymaker’s wedding
Static radio love songs and toys with watchful eyes
🖤🎪 Laughing Jack’s love for Jason 🎪🖤
🕰️🧸 Jason’s love for Laughing Jack 🧸🕰️
Jason talks to LJ about the possibility of…A CHILD?!
Two left feet (and yet he still loves me)
When Laughing Jack met Jason the toymaker [Part One]
When Laughing Jack met Jason the toymaker [Part Two]
A beautiful dress for LJ
Laughing Jack meets Aeliana!
Raisa Accardi, such a sweet little thing
Watching them play
Jason hears about the child!
Laughing Jack and Aeliana talk about friendship
Raisa tries to play with the living children
Laughing Jack and Aeliana’s trip to the carnival!
Raisa’s diary entry (4/17/1955)
Laughing Jack gives Aeliana a show!
Raisa’s diary entry (4/18/1955)
Raisa’s diary entry (4/21/1955)
Raisa’s diary entry (5/16/55)
Hello again!
You’ve used "softly" in both opening sentences. I’m not sure someone can really sleep softly either, unless you mean that his breathing is quiet. You could describe the slow rise and fall of Jason’s chest or the faint sound of his breathing instead.
This moves very quickly from Jason waking up to discussing the child they intend to kill. That abruptness is interesting because it shows where Jason’s mind immediately goes, but I’d perhaps let Jack notice it. Jason doesn’t ask whether Jack is hurt or tired since he only wants to know whether the plan is working. That could hint early on that his priorities are becoming dangerous, and that may help readers feel more immersed.
This is an interesting detail, but I’d like a little clarification about what "for the doll" means. Is Aeliana’s soul going to be placed inside the doll, or does the doll need it to come alive? Is Jason making the doll for himself or someone else? Huh?
***
I'm going to have to do some research into these characters! I think Jack is currently the more developed of the two. I see that he’s clumsy despite his body, patient about the plan, attentive to Jason’s moods and determined to keep his promises. Jason mostly sleeps, asks about Aeliana and expresses impatience, so I’d give him more individual details. His appearance is memorable from what you've written, but I’d like to understand what his relationship with Jack is like emotionally. Does he depend on Jack, manipulate him, genuinely love him or some mixture of all three? I can't tell how they are supposed to be interacting.
There are also hints of an unhealthy dynamic which could be developed. Are they meant to be toxic? Jack immediately excuses Jason’s discontent and tells himself everything will be fine, so I get a feeling there's more to their story.
Cheers! Thanks for sharing!
Lipton
They DO genuinely love each other but in a much more twisted way than how humans would love one another. They are both supernatural serial killers first and foremost, so emotions like love are harder for them to have. This is my AU where I ship them, they’re not actually together. (And Jack may be more developed because he’s my favorite so I’m biased haha).
The soul they are using is for a child they are creating, which is a doll that has magic that can grow to be human. She’s a cloth doll called Raisa (and my ship child OC). The dolls are only alive by the soul of a human, so they are using it for their life source.
They both despise children deeply but Jason decided to create her because he was perplexed as to how humans could genuinely love their own children because he was not loved as a child and wanted to make her as an experiment of sorts. Jack opposed the idea initially but gave in because it was what Jason wanted and he was willing to give it a try. They first made her to just have her be a servant of theirs (she is sent to take children to them under the belief that they are “saving” the children by making them into dolls. She doesn’t realize that the children die when they become dolls and are taken from loving families) and think of killing her if she doesn’t behave, but then they feel affection for her, which is strange and frightening to them.
They still make her look for children but also care for her as best as they can. They don’t tell her anything about the truth and the child, Raisa, believes that her parents are good until some time later, when the truth gets revealed to her in an unsavory light. She’s a sweet kid (unless she’s angry and destroys the dolls, inheriting a bit of their violence/rage. She only gets angry if the ghost kids talk bad about them, which they do a lot, but other than that she’s *generally* a good kid. She gets bullied at school because she doesn’t exactly look human and is very bad socially, so her parents are kind of the only friends she has except for one ghost girl) so hearing the truth bothers her and starts a bunch of terrible events…
But I won’t reveal more. Thx for reading and glad you enjoyed!
Heya~
I’m down for more LJ, so here goes!
Ohh I like that you point out he doesn’t have a heart in that way! Tho maybe you could have adapted and made a description that fit better with the strings he has instead? Maybe they swing, or sing, or pull taut? What ever strings tend to do when they are under stress?
Do they mean Aeliana here? “ It was a long day of tricking a child for LJ” and … I am a bit confused, maybe bc I am still shaky on the lore: Who did the tricking? For LJ? But Jason wants the soul for the puppet… I am so confused qq
I do like the domesticity of this scene (aside from the impatience at the child murder obv). It’s slow and sweet 😊
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Yes, it is Aeliana that he%u2019s talking about.
I%u2019m glad you enjoyed it. ^v^