I don't like the rhyming. It makes it seem like an amateurish piece.
I don't really like how you split up "With no one else it's a different story, kisses and everything else." It's an awkward split...
I like the "gogogo" part, because it makes you read it quickly and that's kind of the point.
Overall, this is not one of my favorite pieces. It's too choppy for my liking, and it's just... awkward.
Points: 6831
Reviews: 594
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