A little lengthy and in a strange way kind of boring. However, it had a good point. Finally, something I understand.
A little lengthy and in a strange way kind of boring. However, it had a good point. Finally, something I understand.
good question, why do we.
i agree with Sarah, last line of the 4th stanza seems rather long.
I don't really like the last line of the first stanza, it doesn't feel quite right to me..
Love the 4th line of the secondstanza 
First line of the 3rd stanza, did you mean here?
I also agree that the last line is a bit lackluster (er, lacklustre, as Jack has informed me it should be spelled)
This is very, very good. The only thing I had a problem with is the last sentence. All the other stanzas seemed very strong to me, and that ending was just a tad weak. I didn't think it related to the rest of the poem very well.
across a crowded room filled with the smell
of teenage hormones and suicide attempts
and war and politicians and everything we should never have seen on tv.
120,200 Literary Works • 649,054 Reviews
Points: 6165
Reviews: 665
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