the one you left behind

by Firestarter

Published July 18, 2005

In Old awful stuff

ed it most.

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
Meshugenah
Review
Meshugenah wrote a review Review · Jul 18, 2005

just a series of numbers on a scrap of paper
with a heart in the corner

oh.. nice.

Good imagery, definitely. The last stanza, last three lines.. oy does that speak true. Also, third stanza, last line.. "scars of no confidence" I got chills from that. As for the rest of that stanza, i like what you're doing with it, but veering of course seems..eh, overdone, I guess. not quite chiche, just overdone (if that made any sense at all). But the line following i love.

User avatar
Chevy
Comment
Chevy commented Comment · Jul 18, 2005

I loved this poem. It was very creative and I love the imagery...it was quite a bit of it but you didn't overdo it. I'm not sure if I grasped the full meaning of the poem, but there was enough there to get the point across. Great work.



Perhaps one did not want to be loved so much as to be understood.
— George Orwell, 1984