My life was simply empty,
I was a shell nothing more.
My tastebuds were so naive
so dull and tired of the same.
One day my mother came home,
with bags of goods galore.
From one of those brown bags,
a tub fell on the floor.
The label read Ice Cream.
A name I could not locate.
If only if I had realised,
how much it would change my fate.
I pulled off the lid,
the smell of vanilla filled the room.
I reached into the cutulry draw
and pulled out a large silver spoon.
Nervously I dipped it,
into the frozen liquid broth.
I brought the spoon unto my lips
for my first ever tasting.
By this time however,
my mouth was already salavating.
My mouth exploded with taste.
My taste buds had gone insane.
The soft vanilla ice cream
was surely to blame.
From then on I was addicted,
every trip to the store,
brought back another flavour,
and everytime I went back for me.
Mint, Strawberry, postachio.
Chocolate, double chocolate,
I simply had to know.
What they all tasted like.
Their flavours I could not comprehend.
But now I sit surrounded,
with an assortment of flavoured tubs.
I didn't find a new food,
a found my one and only love.
So, now raise your spoon skywards,
and speak only the truth.
We all love you Ice Cream,
Just like you knew we would.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,020 Literary Works • 672,731 Reviews
A few spellchecker callers. Rather, this is a very interesting poem. Actually, I'm not conversant with poetry, odes especially. But here, even the title draws attention. I mean there's a bit of humor in saying, "ode to ice-cream" and I love it.
This is the second of your poems that I'm reading and already liking. I tell you, I'm going to check out the other stuffs you have there to see what else catches my attention. I like this one.
There are only a few nitpicks and they're mainly to do with spelling. But I find this poem really very funny.
TIGERSPRITE
I know right
You have no idea how happy I am to be seeing this Ode after just talking about in chat not even an hour ago! Good job!
Unfortunately, I couldn't get the similes to work, so you are going to have to imagine me on the floor laughing. You should set this to music, preferably something that sounds like an anthem.
"But now I sit surrounded,
with an assortment of flavoured tubs.
I didn't find a new food,
a found my one and only love."
In this stanza, don't you mean 'I' in the last line? And flavored is spelled wrong. I interpreted it as an older person looking back at their childhood and describing how they felt about seeing ice cream for the first time. By the way when you say "frozen liquid broth", does that mean it was already melting?