Silence.
Your silence condems
as much as their words.
You hear what they call me,
you appear to not have heard.
We all know you did,
you just to sit quiet.
How do you think I feel,
in this small tiny closet.
They pain it beats me,
i'm broken and bruised.
But you just sit there,
oblivious and bemused.
I might not be screaming,
or shouting in your face.
But through your silence
you condemn my fate.
One day from now,
I might not cope so well.
They'll call me a dirty gay,
tell me to go to hell.
You will just sit there,
not a word from your lips;
but that evening i'll go home,
and end all of this.
I'll string up a noose
with a strong sturdy rope.
I will join the silence;
I simply couldn't cope.
So you might think you're helping,
turning a blind eye.
But your finger is on the trigger;
you're helping me die.
So say something please,
anything, i'm pleading!
Please say something though,
before I hang from the cieling.
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140,165 Literary Works • 673,032 Reviews
Hi there!! Me again ^^!!
Let's get right into it;
I liked this sentence, because it's true. People turn a blind eye when they see something they know they should stop, and do nothing. It's like they might as well jump on in.
I just liked this sentence ^^
I put these three together because stuck out to me. What I get from this is that he's just tired. People see what's happening, and they're just turning a blind eye, so they're no better.
You're telling us that they might as well kill you themselves, since they're just going to stand by and watch you get hurt. In my opinion xD
You're asking for help because your literally at the end of your rope. Like a last ditch effort for someone to reach out to you before you end it all.
Over all, another great poem. The only thing you need to work on is your punctuation, grammar, and I see a few misspelled words. Keep 'em coming!!
Silence was an interesting poem to write about! I love how much energy you put I to the tone of this poem. The words from my screen cam alive and were dancing in my head! Every breath of science was emphasized on a beautiful way! The poem was great and really easy to follow! You just set a clear path for the read and all we had to do was follow it! An amazing poem and I hope you keep writing!
Overall good job and happy review day!
-cherry
this is really amazing! I loved the way you emphasized and the way u detailed every last breath of silence, its such a different poem that's why I like it so much! I love the ending to the poem.
"So say something please,
anything, I'm pleading!
Please say something though,
before I hang from the ceiling."
it just finishes it nicely, u should be proud of that seriously man
Wow...
This was done really well!!!
Lately I've been reading a lot of poetry, and I have to say, this one is one of my top three.
I like the topic you chose and the way you spoke about it. The details really show the truth behind someone's silence, and I love that. The whole topic relays into the subject of depression or killing ones self. It's a sensitive topic to talk or write about, but you did an amazing job on it.
"So you might think you're helping,
turning a blind eye.
But your finger is on the trigger;
you're helping me die."
To me, this seems like someone who is getting bullied has seen as someone they know just stands by and watches. You wrote that out to let the reader know that even if they didn't say anything or physically hurt the person, standing by will just make it worse.
It's beautiful.
The message you portrayed in this was amazing. I loved everything about this poem. The work you did is phenomenal.
Grammar or spelling wise, I see no mistakes.
You should be proud of yourself for this! Keep up the amazing work!!