The shadows

by retrodisco666

Published February 28, 2011

In poem

I can see shadows.

Elongated shadows crawl
the walls of my mind.
My very tissue becomes
staurated by the thought of them.

They race through my blood stream.
It circulated through my organs,
the very chambers of my heart become
lined with shadows. The very pockets
of my lungs compressed with the shadows.

My eyes were once a blue,
sea blue. My son inherted those.
They are now black,
no iris, no white, just black.

I can taste the shadows,
they taste like toxic mixed with blood.
A taste I can never removed,
it lingers with every mouthful, and with
every breath.

I was once happy, alive.
Until they came,
the landed and they attacked.
We became their making,
them who know what we hide.

Thousands of dead were
scattered through the streets
and we all walked by without
even noticing, without caring.

I think I can remember the day,
the day when she touched me.
The pain stabbed me as the shadows crept in.

Months have passes since them a
and now i am alone.
They all left me out,
out of fear or compassion.

I will soon be the shadows,
those posionous black shadows,
those murderous, derlict, solitary black shadows.

I can see the shadows,
they are crawling to the sky.
Trying to block out the sun,
trying to make me the darkness.

Can you see them,
are you sure. . .
Check again.

Comments & reviews · 3
writerwithacause wrote a review Review · Mar 1, 2011

Months have passes since them a
and now I am alone.
They all left me out,
out of fear or compassion.

I will soon be the shadows,
those poisonous black shadows,
those murderous, derlict, solitary black shadows.


Other than these two mispellings, good job! :) This was a well-written poem.

User avatar
Upile
Review
Upile wrote a review Review · Mar 1, 2011

Hey there,
This is a very sad poem. Very well-thought out, very well-written. I sympathize with the character and almost driven to tears. Really good stuff. One mistake though: 'Months have passes since them a
and now i am alone. '' go over this sentence. Something needs to be added or something is missing.
Other then that Bravo!
xxx Upile xxx



He began to wonder why he had felt uneasy at all. It was like a man wondering in broad daylight why a dream had appeared so terrible to him at night.
— Chinua Achebe, Things Fall Apart