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140,561 Literary Works • 673,435 Reviews
I really liked this one as well. I was glad the characters actually met each other and I love the sense of humour that Jon took on in the beggining. Great dialog!
Eh, again not much to say about this.
1. Where are they in the beginning?
2. The action seems to happen faster than reality permits, they get to this place, have drinks, go to waffle house, fight. And it all happens in what feels like (from reading the story) five minutes. Though it was interesting.
3. I'm glad I laughed. You are very funny.
4. I get lost in the dialog just a wee bit and I think it would be nice if there was some more action dropped here and there within the fight, just maybe.
5. I'm done making this list.
Oh, I'm so pleased to see these two characters interact! It seems like they're old friends from college. Jonathan is getting married to Sarah, but it's awkward because Kyle used to date her?
The dialogue in this one is especially good.
I don't have much else to say, and I've got to go, but I do like the contrast between the two men.
Colleen