Chionophobia #13 /P

by Incandescence

  • Novel / Chapter

Published January 6, 2007

In Chionophobia/Prosthesis/Melnikov

PreviousNext

Removed.

End of chapter

Continue to next chapter Chionophobia #14 /P
Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
Emerson
Review
Emerson wrote a review Review · Jan 10, 2007

She saw in him the uncontrollable desire to self-destruct so prominent in every man she had ever loved, and it made her sad to see Jonathon this way.
I ...don't really like the last part. Joanne or who ever suddenly got a boost of emotions that should be left to main characters XD

He saw the black hair licking at the back of one of his patient’s chairs.
Licking?


She began crying as she left his office.
I don't think 'began' fits here, because she was already crying before.. 'began again' might work though.

I can see Sarah and Jons relationship between the lines, you say so little but I see so much. Love it.

User avatar
Riedawriter23
Comment
Riedawriter23 commented Comment · Jan 6, 2007

This was awesome! I felt like I was there quite literally. I'm beggining to think you're a professional Incan. lol. Great job on detail and character developement.



Obsessing over what you regret won't get you anywhere.
— Steggy