Walk with me amidst the colonnades,
wide avenues that lead where love abides.
Sit beside the crystal balustrades,
with loyalty and dignity and pride.
-
Swim with me the rapids of my dreams.
Leave cruel concepts distantly behind.
Come soar with me through ethers yet unseen
until the stars no longer will collide.
-
Assist me to unravel galaxies,
re-tune vast quasars so they keep time true.
Imbibe with me the cosmic energies
Carom through wild dimensions that we knew
Within my heart forever please reside.
My queen!
My love!
My destiny!
My bride!
--
Addendum
Carom
http://thesaurus.yourdictionary.com/carom
https://www.thefreedictionary.com/carom
Balustrade
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139,754 Literary Works • 672,699 Reviews
This is worthy to be read to the great medieval poets of old!
I believe the first stanza is the best of the poem, it really captivated me.
"Walk with me amidst the colonnades,
wide avenues that lead where love abides.
Sit beside the crystal balustrades,
with loyalty and dignity and pride."
The words are beautiful and flowing, and it just is a whimsical read.
You did a great job here, and this really all comes together in the final words, stating the purpose of the poem.
"Carom through wild dimensions that we knew
Within my heart forever please reside.
My queen!
My love!
My destiny!
My bride!"
Loved this poem.
10/10
thanks for the review and compliments. Good to know that you like the poem.
That was quite something. I really liked the construction and the form of the poem. It really gives a good idea of what the poem is all about.
Moreover, your vocabulary was quite impressive and you also managed to incorporate it into the poem in such a way, that it doesn't seem vulgar or awkward.
These lines were very touching and relatable to me -
"Assist me to unravel galaxies.
re-tune vast quasars so they keep time true.
Imbibe with me the cosmic energies
Carom through wild dimensions that we knew
Within in my heart forever please reside.
My queen!
My love!
My destiny!
My bride!"
They clearly explain how much the speaker relishes his beloved and wants her in his life.
I specifically loved the rhyming that you have done. I know it is quite difficult to rhyme and I think you quite nailed it with this one.
Keep it up!
Great work!
Thanks for the review and encouraging words. Much appreciated. Glad to know that you enjoyed the poem.