Warning: This work has been rated 16+.
I want to be a Christian
but excuse me if you will,
I still would like to steal and rape
and other people kill.
-
I still desire to child-abuse
and savage up my wife,
adulterate and fornicate
and seethe with hate and strife.
-
I still desire the sinful fire
of lying to the hilt,
deceiving like the Devil did
without a twinge of guilt.
-
I still desire to fill my mind
with putrid thoughts of lust,
with jealousies and enmities
suspicions and distrusts,
and want to rampage all about
with those who love to sin
while celebrating with a shout
and wide demonic grin.
-
I want to be a Christian too.
Í have a right to be.
Don’t turn away from me today.
I’m honest-can’t you see?
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Verbal Irony
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125,007 Literary Works • 672,815 Reviews
I Love this! This is something people should talk about more in my opinion. Some of the most toxic people I've ever been around are people claim to be. They look to put up a front and say "Praise Jesus", and then act in a way not befitting to the words that just came out of their mouths. Well then, Let's get to it.
This is actually my favorite part of the poem. When I read this, all I could do was nod my head. This is something that can be applied to anyone in my opinion. The first thing I thought when I read this, was that this is a word people like to use when they like to make excuses. They say one, yet they mean another. They say one thing, yet act in a manner that does not fit the description they paint.
For some reason or another. Well done. This poem bring to light an enormous issue that is one of the biggest reasons why I stay away from religion altogether. That reason is hypocrisy. I know not all people are like that, but I've just decided to be the best version of my self and pay it forward.
This made me think of people who like to paint this sweet and unassuming picture of how they want people to see them and project it out for everyone to look at, though it's just a lie they like to fool people with. Go to church, say 'amen', and keep that pretty lie front and center while just behind the facade, they're sitting back with a bag of popcorn and laughing at everyone.
People see a lot of things. People just choose to ignore them, or act as if everything is fine and go on about their lives as if nothing happened. If you look hard enough, you see exactly where those pretty little lies are. People choose what they see and don't see. If given a choice, they'll choose the latter often always. Therein lies the problem.
Overall, I found that I really enjoyed this poem and liked that you touched on an issue that can be found universally in not just religion, but in most things in life. As I've said before, well done. ^^
Thanks for the review. You are right, such behavior is lamentable. Tends to quench the enthusiasm to associate. One feels as if some kind of game is being played. Apparently it does't affect those who choose to be part of the hypocrisy. They all seem to get along just fine.
Sorry. This was copied and pasted above me. Forgot to say this was a review xD
Hey there! It's ZeldaIsShiek here to review another quintessential piece of literature that made my day and win this Review Day by helping the Red Pandas stay in first place and reaching my goal of 80 reviews. I might even get to 100, if I work hard enough. I am really excited to review this amazing piece of art that you have created, and maybe add some witty humor as well. Anyway, that's enough idle chatter from me. Let's get into the review.
Thank you for adding the information on verbal irony. It helped me understand the poem more clearly. I believe the meaning of your poem is that people want to look good on the outside, so they take on the title Christian, but they are really evil people on the inside. Christians can never be lumped into one category, because they are all different kinds of people, and your religion doesn't really say anything about you. It might not even accurately express what you believe in, if you just go to church to feel better about yourself and make yourself appear friendlier and kinder on the outside. What is the point of parents forcing children to make friends only with Christians, if an equal balance of good and bad exists inside and outside? Thank you for reading my review. Your wording and grammar was perfect as always, and your amazing usage of verbal irony at the end sated my hunger for meaningful poetry for now.
That's all for today. Keep writing amazing literature that inspires me to read and review them, and have a great Review Day! Let's beat the Blues once and for all!
~ZeldaIsShiek
Thanks for the review Zelda. Much appreciated. I wrote this in this verbally ironic way because I find that the shunning practices some Christians employ against those church members they consider worthy to be shunned is excessive. In fact, it only serves to turn a person away from Christianity because it comes across as cruel. Jesus told us that a sick person needs a physician. It tells us to seek out a lost sheep.
Thank you for explaining this. I really did enjoy your poem.
I was explaining another poem. Got mixed up. Sorry about that Zelda.
Oh, haha. It's fine. I applied this one to the one about shunning.
This poem is a little bit offensive to Christians. I'm not sure if you meant it like that, but that is what I got from this poem. Yes, even if you are a Christian, you still sin, but that doesn't mean that they want to. Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that your poem is bad, I'm just saying that some people could get offended by this. Other than that, your poem is great. Keep writing!:)
If they get offended it is because they are misunderstanding it.
Good day Radrook!
This poem is very relevant both to society today, as well as to the short comings of the modern church.
For example, when my father was a child, my grandfather was a high up in a Baptist church. To the church, he was the epitome of what a man should be, he could do no wrong in their eyes. He was a strong leader, a godly man, a stern but great father, and a doting husband. That was, until you opened the doors into his life. For all that he portrayed himself as a servant of God, his servitude lay much lower than that. At home, he beat his children, abused his wife, entered into high levels of sexual immorality, and was no better than a tyrant in how he ruled his family. After destroying them to the point that his sons were spread among the family and his wife was in an asylum, he abandoned them.
Most self proclaimed Christians are no better than this. They fall on their knees in church, crying to be forgiven and saved. They show a clean face and empty conscious, but in reality they are only white washed walls. They are cleaned of their sin on the outside, but dig a bit deeper and they are filled with rot and decay, sin and filth falling with every step.
As a teen, i struggle with this a lot. Finding the balance between humanity and God, and still putting God first, is hard. It's demoralizing, because even when I am trying hard to do well, I look around and my peers and mentors and falling apart and giving up around me.
In your work, I found no errors, it is well written, as usual your word choices are unique and impeccable.
Keep on writing,
Autopilot
Thanks for the feedback and encouragement. Good to know that others detect what I detect and than I am not alone in detecting it.
Thanks for the feedback and encouragement. Good to know that others detect what I detect and than I am not alone in detecting it.
Hi. This is kman134. I'm here to review your work.
I'm agnostic and not a huge fan of religion. Although I'm not a christian, I can respect people's decisions to be a good one. however, while some people try to uphold the christian virtues and follow the golden rule, others who claimed to be christians hypocritically disregard the virtues and enjoy filling themselves with sin and puss without a care about the ramifications.
Everything you had just put into your poem. All the insidious, ugly, self-destructive acts. these are the desires most humans want that are inside this poem. the need to dominate, to abuse, to sexually satisfy, to adulterate, to kill, to manipulate, to indulge in narcotics are all what the most vile human beings crave for. Even in church, you can find these people trying to weasel their way into salvation but still keep up the facade of "being a christian", or any religion.
Personally, I'm on the moral gray side and believe that good and evil are more complex than how the majority of people assume as even good people can do bad things and even bad people can do some good things. I believe that it is good to self-indulge but not at the cost of ruining your life, or the lives of others.
"I still desire to fill my mind
with putrid thoughts of lust,
with jealousies and enmities
suspicions and distrusts,
and want to rampage all about
with those who love to sin
while celebrating with a shout
and wide demonic grin."
this is my favorite part in the poem. it reminds me of the mind of deviants from the Purge where sadism and paranoia are released from the various citizens in the dystopian society where the movie takes place. the biblical symbolisms of demons, sodom, and gamorrah was really interesting as the christian church uses them as examples of what is deemed sinful and what is not.
anyways, I love this poem. can't wait to read more of your works.
Thanks for the review and encouraging words. The poem is actually based on the many negative experiences I had with people claiming to be Christians while behaving like the Devil. It baffled me quite a bit at first since I couldn't understand how they were rationalizing the whole thing. Then it slowly dawned on me that not everyone there was actually sincere, knew that they were being insincere, and really didn't care.
Then I realized that such hypocrisy is actually simply part of human fallen nature. You have doctors taking a the Hipocratic oath not to harm but being sadistic towards patients they don't like for racist or ethnic reasons.
I actually met a professor who had garnered awards for being fair minded towards minorities but who was a racist.Humans come in all varieties and exotic combinations. I guess that's what makes humans unpredictable. But since those who claim to be Christians proudly proclaim themselves to be the paragons of morality, their impish antics struck me as especially weird.
humans are naturally selfish and do what they can to survive to a certain degree. while altruism is important when it comes to helping your fellow man, it is important to be a little selfish as long as it doesn't hurt people in the process.
I've seen doctors who perform malpractice on their patients, which hypocritically violates the Hippocratic oath. however, it isn't just racism that contributes this, but also greed and mental illness as well. In one of the dexter novel series, Dexter killed a physician who was using his profession to murder his patients while making it look like malpractice or natural causes as a means to satiate his psychopathic tendencies. that might not be a good example since it's fictional, but it still reflects certain real-life events.
When it comes to Christians and Christianity, nothing has really changed since the Middle Ages. although the reformation has changed some policies and decrees of the church, some things just stay the same. Like I said before, people claim to be the paragon of morality and be perfect christians as a way to save face and weasel their way into salvation because "Jesus forgives everyone who accepts him into their hearts". honestly, I think even Jesus has his limits of forgiveness, and it is not just the people, even some of the priests can act the same as well.
Thank you for replying back and thank you for your donation.
I am a Christian myself, and a college student. So, the struggle is all too real to me. I sin, I mess up and screw up what being a Christian is like because right now, I am not much of one. You are honest with yourself and not most people are. You will never meet a person that says: "Hi, I'm X , I'm a bad person." Everyone thinks they're wonderful people, but you know that as humans it's not possible because you just put all the desires of humanity into a poem. You did well with capturing the flesh, and rhyming was amazing
I am a Christian myself, and a college student. So, the struggle is all too real to me. I sin, I mess up and screw up what being a Christian is like because right now, I am not much of one. You are honest with yourself and not most people are. You will never meet a person that says: "Hi, I'm X , I'm a bad person." Everyone thinks they're wonderful people, but you know that as humans it's not possible because you just put all the desires of humanity into a poem. You did well with capturing the flesh, and rhyming was amazing
Thanks for the feedback. I personally do not consider myself a wonderful person. I consider myself a sinner like everyone else. However, what I am speaking about is people who should know better and yet pronounce what is evil OK or even good.
Isaiah 5:20 %u25BA
New International Version
Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.