It is in all of us
and it lurks
and it searches
for you...
And it's always there
and it watches you while you sleep
as the hands on the clock move from dusk to dawn
it's there!
And it knows
how
to
get
you
but you have to let it first
you have to call on it
however...
you'll lose self respect
and tolerence is already gone
It
Is
The Demon
It comes when we bekon to it
It's with us
All
the
time
night and day
When we call for it
it'll come for us, to us
and it'll be the last thing we see....
Suicide!
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139,464 Literary Works • 672,570 Reviews
Yeah, your poem wasnt morbid one bit!
try reading some of "TanisNikana"'s work, some guy at another forum, he has this one piece which was awsome.
Anyways, yeah... doesnt stir emotion or anything.
Not bad but not good.
I just had a lollipop so you could completely ignore this post...but I laughed so hard I almost wet myself...I don't think that's quite the effect you're going for...
Morbid?
I'm tiring of that word.
Wow, thanks all of you. *takes a quick glance at Fontroy's post* Thanks a lot...
cool well done TBR, no wait it a suicide poem. So god i don't know how to say well done in a morbid way?
oh.. very cool effect.
To me, the caps over did the effect of the lines themselves. as it is, the lines up out, which I don't always like in poetry. I think I slightly more subtle approach would be neat, and give me more shivers, but that's me, and stylistic opinion.
very true to reality, too. those thoughts sneak up.. ok, strange way of putting it, perhaps, but it seems that way to me. fester in brains..yeah.
and the title is quite appropiate.
What Chrisi said.. I like the format too.
*shivers* Wow. Very dark. Scary. Nice effect.