It is in all of us
and it lurks
and it searches
for you...
And it's always there
and it watches you while you sleep
as the hands on the clock move from dusk to dawn
it's there!
And it knows
how to get you
but you have to let it first
you have to call on it
however...
you'll lose self respect
and tolerence is already gone
It is the Demon
It comes when we bekon to it
It's with us
All
the
time
night and day
When we call for it
it'll come for us, to us
and it'll be the last thing we see....
Suicide!
Points:
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IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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Suicide is is an individuals ultimate choice (*like abortion*). I do not think you should use the word we. Especially since you switched from us to you in the first verse. You should not switch back in the end.
Also, last verse should implicate suicide, instead of revealing it.