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Young Writers Society

Listening to Your Stories

by Chevy

well, here's a poem of mine that doesn't make any sense. it's also in the random section, but even though it makes no sense at all, I LOVE IT...and yes, i'm a little out of it.

that would go on for me to come.
There was a everyday I was walking up that walkway,
I’d for usually listen to your stories sat slouching white house f what we all knew as Helen’s Lane,
At the edge with a picket fence and a porch hours.
You’d look at me for much
To where you swing.
It felt like waiting -needed advice.

i told you! makes no sense!

Is this a review?



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94 Reviews

Points: 890
Reviews: 94

Thu Feb 24, 2005 11:57 am
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AstrangedbeaR says...

it wernt all that bad, didnt understand it but seeing that is what you were aiming for then yeah...ts pretty good lol.
keep up the good work :)

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145 Reviews

Points: 890
Reviews: 145

Wed Feb 23, 2005 11:13 pm
Skye says...

I myself don't like it very much, though I do understand the feeling behind it. Judging by an above post, though, any feeling in it is accidental. So...there's not much to say, is there?

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205 Reviews

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Reviews: 205

Wed Feb 23, 2005 10:25 pm
PsyLynx wrote a review...

hey, it be good. I likes it, anyway. And yeah, it doe tell a story. And I appreciate the notice that it wasn't supposed to make sense; save me the hassle of having to complain about the random f in it. But for lots of the best poetry, you have to look at it crookedly to understand. I looked at this crookedly and felt like I got it, so, yeah, I'm rambling, I liked it.

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665 Reviews

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Reviews: 665

Mon Feb 07, 2005 5:45 pm
Chevy says...

thanks jack for understanding!,lol
anyway, it was supposed to be confusing--no one was supposed to understand. it was actually a real poem, i just went and mixed up the words because i didnt like it anymore. i wanted it to be something that you wouldnt get--i hadnt expected anyone to like it either.

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1259 Reviews

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Mon Feb 07, 2005 4:16 pm
Firestarter says...

Yes, you're right there, it makes no sense.

Wahey for randomness!

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323 Reviews

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Reviews: 323

Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:45 pm
hekategirl says...

I don't know what to think of this poem, it sort of made sense at the beginning and then got confusing the rest of the poem. The beginning started to abruptly, I don't know why but it sounded like you took the beginning out from another longer poem.

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418 Reviews

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Reviews: 418

Sun Jan 23, 2005 7:29 pm
electricbluemonkey wrote a review...

Whoa...uh, lets just say that it isn't one of your best.

It was just too confusing, everything was happening at once, and everything was kind of nothing actually. Way too abstract like Incandescence said.

The last line was really confusing, even more than the whole poem itself, and it just didn't fit.

I liked it a bit, it was a good read for a few seconds, but I think you may have spent way too little time on writing this.

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78 Reviews

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Reviews: 78

Sun Jan 23, 2005 6:13 pm
Soyala Amaya wrote a review...

Erm...I'm sorry, I didn't understand it. Though that's all right. I have a poem called "Welcome' that no one but me and my friends would understand. This poem might mean something to you, but everyone else will just be like 'huh?" If it means something to you, kudos, if it's just wasted web-space, well, whatever floats your boat.

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137 Reviews

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Reviews: 137

Sat Jan 22, 2005 10:32 am
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Wulie says...

It confused me a tad but after reading it a few times you start to understand it to some extent though I don't perticually love it.

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915 Reviews

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Sat Jan 22, 2005 4:52 am
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Incandescence wrote a review...

This is not in line with what I consider good poetry. It's too abstract for my own tastes, and I think you'll find that abstraction does not create good feedback, for future reference. No matter, most of the great poetry of our times is abstract, and I suppose if you can master abstraction, you can be one too. Most people just aren't that good.

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1258 Reviews

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Sat Jan 22, 2005 4:19 am
Sam wrote a review...

Actually, it kind of did. :D I liked it, up until the last line, which confused me. This was about telling stories, not getting advice. Please explain if you're going to leave that in there for us to interpret.

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
— Albert Einstein