I haven't even been writing poetry for a year, so this is truly my weakest point in writing. I'm a whiz at essays, reports, realistic and historical fiction. So please, keep this in mind.
I was in my hiding place,
In a world where my dignity lie;
Trampled over and forgotten.
Where the hardest part of all,
Was watching it go.
Falling—fading into another world—
I saw it leaving.
Parting me with an arrogance, I will fail to forget.
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This seems incomplete. Do you want to link it to the beginning? If so, perhaps:
The ending seems, well, rather vague and slightly boring. A good poem would be the first five lines. It might be short, but it would be awesome XD
-Evang.
It's nice. I'd change "lie" to "lies", and put a comma after "forgotten" instead of a full stop. I'd also put "I will fail to forget" onto a line of its own.
I loved "fading into another world", and the last line was really good.
It was very short. Not bad, but very short.
It's pretty short, so there's not all that much you can do to it.
I liked it, and I couldn't really find any thing to critique.