Piano to Pianist... Another inanimate given life.

I loved this❤. Truly.

Each line of each paragraph is well written and easy to grasp. And I must admit I burst out laughing when I got to the

The loh yeh moh yeh song, I sing,

Just the way you want me to.

Lines. I am a bit high so please forgive me if it wasnt meant to be funny. I dont really have anything bad or any critiques to give you I'm afraid. I feel strongly that your poem served its purpose, it was clear and creative. I also see you have many more works and I am really interesting in reading them. Keep up the good work

It might just be me, but the "I'm in love with an inanimate object" poem style always makes me a wee bit uncomfortable - that being said, you do a good job with making the double meaning clear without it being spelled out. You leave some ambiguity for interpretation, but give us specific images and songs to think about.

So, I think there were some lines that didn't quite work for me - The specific song references, "The loh yeh moh yeh song, I sing," and "O' beautiful lady! Never stop lovin' me." seemed like sort of throw away lines, that didn't add much to either narrative.

I also wish you would delve a bit more into how the piano actually loves the person - because that is the part that I don't quite get in here - I think it would be easier to see the music doing that, but a piano itself, I'm a bit lost - I think you could expand the metaphor a bit more and show us your line of thinking.

For flow, I think the poem could benefit from a slight rhyme scheme - it would make the poem even sound more musical - and be careful about repeating words at the end of your lines, like "me" and "heart/soul" it makes the poem feel very repetitious like all the same words and phrases are being re-used over and again, even if they aren't, because so much attention is drawn to the last word of the line.

Music is such an emotive thing, this poem is certainly an interesting way of tackling the emotion that is tied to musical expression. I think this could be an interesting subject for you to keep writing poetry about and see what comes up for you.

Keep writing Eros!

~alliyah

Hi, eros, how are you doing???


Amazing dear... I love the way you describe it. It was well-written and I love it. Each para is well written and has a great meaning to it. and I can interpret this in many different ways. Beautiful eros.. Keep writing...

That is a good poem!
Now i personally love poems that have multiple interpretations, as they give one the freedom to empathise with them in their own way. This is one of those poems. It can be interpreted as written to a lover, or ones passion, as yours is piano,and as we all are writers here, we can all relate to our love for our passions.
The poem has a good flow and rhythm, and I didn't find any akward places. The imagery is good and makes one feel better.
Overall,I really liked this poem!

I think that's quite well done to have a double meaning to your poem - one could be pianos, one could be a romantic lover.
Excellent job on constructing the verses and the stanzas - they make sense and flow (most of the time).
A few lines I thought were a little hard to find the rhythm, but for the most part they all flowed together.
Love the imagery, really paints a colorful picture.
"Loh yeh moh yeh" - didn't understand what that meant but maybe it was a pop culture ref that I missed.

This is great! Keep up the good work!