To say goodbye is not so hard...

This poem... Well, I wrote it when I was crying. It's not about a love lost. No, it's about something else. Something I battle with constantly. Something that causes me to cry a lot. Something that splits my being in two. (Yes, I'm feeling dramatic today ) I hope you enjoy, I feel better after writing it.
Oh, yes, it would be me addressing God, in a way I suppose. It's longer than I usually write. Oh look! I'm running out of points cause I have done 0 reviews this month cause of NaNo! let's call Dec. Review month All the 'Yous' are captilized for a reason. If I missed one, let me know (I'm not counting You've/You're etc.)
Oh Yes! Thanks for reviews and likes! (I usually forget to thank you for those )


To say goodbye is not so hard...


To say goodbye is not so hard.
It is as if we could begin again,
if only we say that word.
But, if I were to say goodbye,
would You find yourself in ecstasy?
Or longing for what has finished,
for a long while anyways.
It’s not as if I could influence the decision you’ve made.

Up there on your golden throne,
You know best, I know You do.
But sometimes I doubt,
What was written in the clouds,
because I wish it to not be.
It’s not hard to say goodbye,
But yet it is.

I find the tears flowing faster,
wanting more,
Wishing for more.
Why can’t I have more?

I know You know best,
I know You will always lead me to where I need to be,
I know it takes all of you to deny me this peace,
But sometimes I wonder, must I always follow my mind,
and not give into the quiet whispers my heart sends to me in the dead of night,
when I am sleeping on a cloud, dreaming thoughtless dreams.


Can I whisper into your ear,
convince you differently?
Can I let my heart decide,
what is best for me?
Is it wrong to wish that of anybody,
A thoughtless, whimsy dream.

Yes I know my time has come and gone,
we decided this long ago.
When I found myself in a position,
where the dream was real.

I promised, swore never to speak of it again,
Promised I would never beg for it again.
But I can’t really promise away something that my heart longs for
With every breath in my lungs,
and every beat of my heart.
It’s over, it’s gone, it won’t come back.
I hold those memories to my heart,
and pray I have those moments photographed,
Held close. Never to be damaged, or tarnished from age.

I wish for new ones though.
And I pray,
You allow, to give me them,
in due time.
I know it is a lot to ask,
but would I be me if I didn’t ask for more?

Would I be me if I didn’t let my heart whisper louder than it should?
Would I be me if I didn’t wish upon a star that someday I would hold more?
Would I?

I know You know best,
and know all I long for.
So all I ask,
is another chance.
To show the world,
what stars are made out of.

To say goodbye is not so hard,
except when it’s to something you can’t go a day without thinking about.