I forgot to tell you something...

by LadySpark

Published April 23, 2012

In Poems from Before I Was A Poet

Heehee. Just fluff. Short, cute fluff. I loved writing it. Sometimes I need to take a break from the grindstone that is novels and just write fluff. It's so much fun. No commitment to a story with an actual plot, no worries about character building, because all it is, is exactly what it is. Cute romantic fluff to make you feel fuzzy and warm inside. Hope it does it's job! (My God, I'm going to have to review. So far I've posted 4 things, and another thing on the way. I feel so bad.)

“Let’s run away.” He whispered in her ear, tightening his arms around her waist.

“I can’t run away.” She replied, burying her face in his chest and and becoming overwhelmed by the smell that was him. Mint leaves and cherry wood tobacco, which would never make sense, since he didn’t smoke a pipe, and she didn’t think anyone he knew did either. But that smell was what he was, that’s what made him. A woodsy, smoky smell with a bright sharp scent thrown in. Perfect. “Why? There’s nothing that says you can’t. You’re old enough.”

“Just because I’m old enough doesn’t mean my parents would be very accepting of it.”

“Then tell them you’re on a road trip. Tell them you’ll be back in a couple of weeks. Keep in touch with them over those weeks. I just can’t keep hiding.”

“I know.” Her arms wrapped around his neck and she swayed a little, praying that he wouldn’t push the subject. She knew she couldn’t say no. She knew she’d end up going on a crazy road trip with him, falling even more in love. But was that really a problem anymore? She had been afraid of her feelings before. Been afraid that she’d get her heart broken. But then she’d look into his eyes and those worries would seem trivial and stupid. I don’t have the strength to say no, She thought desperately. I can’t stand to see him unhappy. And, maybe, in the back of her mind, she wanted to run away just as much as he did. If not more. “We can’t go by ourselves. We could always take Nikki.”

He looked at her, and smiled his half smile. “Does that mean you’ll go?”

“I--I guess so. If Nikki will.”

He smiled and kissed her, his lips fitting perfectly with hers, as they always did. “When?”

“A few days. I’ll text you.”

“Okay. I’ll be waiting, Love.”

She grinned and kissed his jaw, then turned around and walked off, leaving him standing there, watching her go. When she was almost out of sight, he chased after her and caught her by the waist. “I forgot to tell you something.”

“Yes?”

“I love you.”

And with that, he was gone, walking off in a different direction, leaving her stunned and alone, her foggy mind taking a while to register that he’d just said the thing that had been on the tip of her tongue since the day she met him.

“I love you too.” She whispered, and then disappeared into the darkness, her heart beating to the sound of the words ringing in her head. ‘I love you. I love you. I love you...’

Comments & reviews · 1
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xDudettex
Review
xDudettex wrote a review Review · Apr 23, 2012

Spark!

You were totally right. That was fluff at it's best. The last line had me aww-ing and smiling like a loon :P

This doesn't really warrant a proper review as it's so short, but I do have two things I want to mention.

Firstly - '“Let’s run away.” He whispered in her ear' - The full stop should be a comma and 'He' should be written as 'he'. Like this -

'“Let’s run away," he whispered in her ear'

The same with the other dialogue in the story.

Secondly - I want to know who Nikki is. I know this is a short story that doesn't really have a point to it, other than to make the reader feel all warm and fuzzy inside but, seeing as it's Nikki that makes 'she' finally agree to run away, I think it would be nice to know who Nikki is. Is she a sister? Friend? The name of her car? lol You get my point.

Also, I've just realised that you didn't name either of the characters. It would be nice to know their names, just so I could imagine them a little more. It'll help make them seem more real too. A name is the most personal thing a human has. It's sort of like their identity.

Overall though, this story did just what you said it would, and I'm glad :)

Thanks for the read!

xDudettex



Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon.
— Paul Brandt