Down in the deep South
I was born
Kicking, crying
I was a little bundle of energy
Then we moved
Still in the deep South
I roamed
Hot sweaty summer days
And cool long autumn nights
Some years it snowed
Some it didn't
We stayed in the land
Of cotton
And ancient plantations
Battlegrounds of wars and
Homes of treaties
History came to life in the South
Like hidden treasure
So valuable
I thought that it was just people talking about it
But the rich history of the South--
Like the soil slaves worked so many years ago--
Was dug up, one day,
In the middle of a classroom
And I couldn't get enough of it
And since then
I've loved my home
In the deep
Deep
South.
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Amazing and enthralling.
Such a beautiful poem and write up. Keep it up.
Thanks for the praise!
Hello there, Kat here to write a review for you !
Originally from a nice little town in Georgia , I totally get you . Where I live now is very historical too , but not in the same way . Something about the way people are in the south , how they cook , what they say , and what exactly happened all those years ago ...
Anyways , I really loved this poem and congrats on literary spotlight ! It's really wonderful to see something like this ... I might be the only person who though of a log cabin , green grass , an old cannon , a rocking chair , and really great country fried steak ! But that's okay, I enjoyed it anyways .
~Kat
Thanks a lot!
Hey there, wisegirl22! cleverclogs here to review! (Hey, that rhymes!
)
I live in the South, too. I'm not sure if NC is considered "deep", but I consider it to be South enough to relate to this poem. Especially these lines.
This perfectly describes what the climate here is like. Hot summers, cool winters, sporadic snow. Check, check, check. It almost made me feel homesick, even though I'm still living here. I think it has something to do with the wistful tone of this poem. *dramatic sigh*
Despite not really considering myself a Southerner (the food is good, though), I was still able to feel the sense of love and pride in this poem. The poem takes on a tone that evokes images of my home and really makes me feel something. I think that anyone who feels a sense of pride in their homeland will be able to relate to this, even if their homeland isn't in the South.
I wasn't a huge fan of these lines. The first line sounds nice, but it doesn't really mean anything, and the second lines feel a little tacked-on. I'd recommend changing them.
These lines were a little unnecessary. Why mention moving if you still ended up in the South? They didn't really affect the poem in any way, so I'd recommend removing them, and maybe replacing them with some more of that awesome imagery.
I love the connection between the soil and the history of the South. It's a great bit of poetic language to say that the history was "dug up".
Here, I find myself wondering what it was about that history that made the narrator love the South. I mean, the South does have a lot of rich and interesting history, but I'm not sure what in particular would make the narrator suddenly love the South. I don't claim to be an expert in history, but it seems that the South's record of racism would be a major blemish. I'm not saying that it's wrong for the narrator to love the South, but it would be nice to have some insight as to what it was about the history that would make her love it. Sorry for that jumbled mess of a paragraph; that thought was very difficult to put into words.
Overall, I loved the image that this evoked, and I loved the emotion that was put into it. It could use a bit of touching up, but I'm sure you can fix that. Keep up the great work!
I love the South. I used to like it, I guess, but I learned about the Swamp Fox (AKA someone who fought in the war that was in the South) and the Civil War and every little battle that was fought down here...it was just like I uncovered a part of the land I was living on. To be honest, I kind of did.