Falling Solo

Yes! It's true! That is definitely tear-worthy!

Hello,


I'm Ranay:

When I was younger at one time I felt like this mentally even though I was healthy physically. But when I read this it brought me back to that time period in my life and it was just as strong as when I felt it. It's impressive and also extremely depressing. But I hope when people read it they get the same feeling and it'll change a few people's opinions on certain things. Keep up the good work. Though it was simple it seems like it has a lot of meaning behind it and that's what I like seeing. ^^

This is like a poem telling a story in pictures. Well written!

This is really interesting, and I like how ambigous this poem is kept.
The way that the poem is formatted- with sentences cut short- really gives a feeling of something moving.
I really like how you can feel the character's fear as they approach the unknown.
Just a quick question though- given that this is under fanfiction and your username shares some connotation to the percy jackson series, is this percy jackson fanfiction?

To all of my readers--I'm looking for this work to be featured, what do you say? To help me achieve my goal, can you please like this after you've read it? Thanks a lot! I love y'all guys!

Perfect poem!
I love how you used a relatable situation. There are always times when you have dreams where you are falling and this poem describes this situation perfectly.
I especially like how you you used a good amount of repetition in your poem. Repetition helps tie the poem together and this one flowed perfectly.
Great job on your poetry. Keep writing you are amazing!
Lovetswift1300

Hey, it's Neverland here to review your piece!

First off, I really liked it! It was very emotional as the 'people' and @LuckyPanda2301 said. I myself like poems, but short poems are always a nice read when I don't have much time, though I'm glad that I do have the time to stop and review your piece.

There is only two things I'd like to point out...
One, I think you might need to fix up the spacing a little bit, you'll probably find that most people will read a poem better if it's been put into stanzas - even a short poem like this.
Two, you start off with short sentences, with only one or two words, but then you change into longer lines, so they really do need to be spaced.

But other then those two things I really enjoyed reading this poem and I'm glad that I did indeed have time to review.

Good luck with writing and keep up the great work, I look forward to seeing ore of your work in the Greenroom,
~Neverland.

Wow. That is the first thing that came to my mind was wow. This was a very deep and emotional poem. I can tell that you are very talented. I really enjoy the line spacing. I have a thought; what if you use dashes at the end of some lines to add a little something to it? Just a suggestion, you don't have to if you don't want. Overall, I just want to say that I really enjoyed this. Keep up the good work!

Wow! This is so good and sad. ;( Very emotional and I really think those people are telling the truth. You seem good at this. It has a lot of deeper meaning, but it is a bit confusing. I know the main message, but each of the words are talking about different things. I do not know if that is how you intended it to be, but it can be better if it was just one primary thing. Again, this is a really good poem and you should continue with poems too.

And also, the fact that you added Tartarus (I see that you've read Percy Jackson ) attracts lots of Percy Jackson fans (like me )

Keep it up!
~ LuckyPanda