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125,022 Literary Works • 672,758 Reviews
Hi Gem! Hannah here to review your lovely poem. Let's go ahead and get started!
Starting with the format, I like how some lines are more blurry than others, I don't know if it is intentional but it ties in well with the theme of the poem. The formatting is very aesthetically pleasing.
The poem is beautiful, your imagery is clean and it is filled with intelligent metaphors. My favorite line was "I just need more nightmare fuel." as an insomniac I relate, and as someone who is insecure, I feel this. I didn't know how common it was to self-sabotage yourself over curiosity's sake, and so I LOVED that detail.
My only critique is that by mentioning cuts/blood, you may want to add a trigger warning notice or change the maturity rating. I know you don't mean self-harm, but with the topics his poem covers, certain people may be in their feels and get caught off guard as well, haha.
The sarcasm in this poem and the anger inside of it is truly profound. This line really hit me
because it illustrates how it's ironic that only now they begin to realise the damage that they have done to you. Now, when you ask for it, they won't give it to you. It gives the impression of macabre irony.
I love the way that you have used questions which only adds to the meaning of it, the confusion even. Additionally, the lack of capital letters is very effective.
I can't think f any critiques but well done!
Hey, foreveryoung299 to give a short review.
This was so relatable. I was spell bound, speechless... They are so many words like that. You will find a thousand people finding out your flaws and discourage you. There are a limited group of encouraging people. Of course, pointing out someone's flaw is important to make them better but why will they discourage us and be harsh to us? They could tell in a genial way. People always think we can't do anything of our own. Why? Because they mistake themselves with us. Because they can't do anything of their own, they assume the same applies for us.
This is the interpretation which I got from your poetry work. It was a great work. By the way, is it a picture? Because the writing seems quite vague. The letters are not very clear.
Keep writing. Enjoyed it.
Bye
–ForeverYoung299
I think everyone can relate to this and learn from this. People don't seem to understand that the guilt we feel from making mistakes is enough. We don't need someone to point them out and shame us for them. Thank you for saying something I couldn't figure out how to say.