Young Writers Society

Heya gemmy! Incoming review!

As always, your poetry is amazing. And I can't wait to review your work.

You know, this is the first time in a while where I can't find anything to critique. So Instead let me point out the things that really got me engages in your poem!

The first thing that was apparent was that your poem was slightly longer and, I don't know why, my attention span for reading longer works has been nonexistent recently. But with each stanza you packed a punch and it made me want to read on. You gave your poem momentum with all this imagery that propelled me forward just how the world propels young people into adulthood.

when i was younger i had alarming confidence

i made no apologies for my words

Hi queenshadowgem,
Delirium Nervosa here to leave a review on your poem.

What can I say but WOW! That piece was extremely engaging and relatable. The way you have structured your stanzas and verses adds an extra dimension to this incredible piece of poetry.
I enjoyed how you didn't make it personal, but aimed it in a generalised way, in order for the reader to interpret the words in their own way. I was pleasantly surprised at how emotionally connectable the piece was.

I love how you convey the growth of the "character" throughout the poem. That once, they would have reacted, retorted, but now, they're at a point where that is no longer a necessary nor valid response. I love the realness that this poem portrays and how it really shines a light on how people are feeling, tucked away, in today's society.

Thank you for this wonderful piece and I look forward to reading more of your work in the future.

-Delirium Nervosa

hi @queenshadowgem

this is jay here for a review cause it was a lovely poem i read so here is a review from you @queenshadowgem

okay this what i got so far First off this was a great nice good poem that i read and what was good from your poem was when you said in it was
but instead i remember how

i used to play in the rainforest of your

mind and watch your thoughts grow like the

grass does now it was so green and so sublime

the trees seemed small because

i used to take up so much more space

back when i knew my significance

--- and everyone got there own onion



Second my compliments in the poem is you made some of the people on Yw to express there self in to this poem @queenshadowgem


3rd and you can improve is that i knew you wrote this and it was some great work you have done @queenshadowgem you did your best of poetry and e get it some people are good at poetry



4th and what i didn't like in the poem thoughts spinning like nothing does at all

they twist as they turn

the past makes no apologies

and the future smears it all

what on earth are we doing here

the grass sways because it is so tall

it swishes above my head as i ponder it all but i was thinking @queenshadowgem i was saying that like this part was like the others to me in my onion and i like poems when they got something in there mind and make as good



5th gem a poem like this would be more to that and i would thought of something in y mind i would really would put on this poem if i was you gem i would add something else to that poem


keep up the good work and keep writing!!! by Jay

Hey there! Mordax here for a review. I lovedddd this poem so decided to review it a bit differently by simply walking you through my thoughts as I read:

thoughts spinning like nothing does at all
they twist as they turn

the past makes no apologies
and the future smears it all

the grass sways because it is so tall
it swishes above my head as i ponder it all

and everything in my reflection is distorted
unsorted like my past poetry

and now my friends
are all but gone

everything feels quite scripted
now and every word seems forced

the trees seemed small because
i used to take up so much more space
back when i knew my significance

surely theres a reason

Moving poem.It’s thought-provoking and questions the meaning of life.I think everyone has thought this way sometimes.My favorite lines in the poem are:”Everything feels quite scripted.” People have definitely felt this way throughout life.Overall,I thought that this poem was relatable and true.Good job on your poem and I hope you have a good day/night!

Moving poem.It’s thought-provoking and questions the meaning of life.I think everyone has thought this way sometimes.My favorite lines in the poem are:”Everything feels quite scripted.” People have definitely felt this way throughout life.Overall,I thought that this poem was relatable and true.Good job on your poem and I hope you have a good day/night!