How dare the leaves still rustle?
In homes, roadsides and forests,
In villages and cities a-bustle --
How do the trees still breathe?
How dare the seasons still pass?
In barks, blossoms, and bearings,
In grounds of both flowers and grass --
How do the lives still flourish?
How dare the world still spin?
In currents, quakes, and auroras,
In hearts of both virtue and sin --
How do the motions still be?
How dare the sun still shine?
In every sea and continent,
In planets 'twixt worlds entwine --
How do the photons still exist?
How dare the galaxy still stir?
In stars, nebulae and supernovas,
In singularities that never were --
How do the realities still apparate?
How dare my pen still write?
In poems, stories and diaries,
In love stories that weren't right --
How do I still keep living?
How dare my broken heart still be staying?
In every place, thought and time,
In everything where I find her being --
How do I still keep loving?
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You're poem is interesting, I interpreted it as wishing time would move more slowly, how dare the world spin? The rhyme scheme is something I haven't seen before. It's like an ABAC scheme, I haven't seen that before.
I love the theme, though, wanting time to move more slowly, wanting to live in a moment, but having no power against time. It is poetic and beautiful. The story also seems to tackle issues of heartbreak and depression, which shows maturity and grace in handling. Very good. Only suggestion is I would do an ABAB rhyme scheme, but that's just me.
ABAC is kinda common in classical as well as modern poetry -- but, my interpretation of the poem is that the narrator is so broken down after his heartbreak that he gets furious at reality itself for carrying on as usual, as if the universe should have responded to the narrator's sorrow with some fanfare. Basically Funeral Blues by WH Auden but much more drastic and reality-bending.
Thanks for the review by the way! :p
You're poem is interesting, I interpreted it as wishing time would move more slowly, how dare the world spin? The rhyme scheme is something I haven't seen before. It's like an ABAC scheme, I haven't seen that before.
I love the theme, though, wanting time to move more slowly, wanting to live in a moment, but having no power against time. It is poetic and beautiful. The story also seems to tackle issues of heartbreak and depression, which shows maturity and grace in handling. Very good. Only suggestion is I would do an ABAB rhyme scheme, but that's just me.