Hello!
This is a very sad, dark poem-- but, I absolutely loved it. You touched every aspect of this man's life. How he stayed alive for his family and now he's facing his last few moments. I especially love the last stanza:
When the slaughter is over, and there is peace,
The innocent’s cries will still weigh down the breeze
Till the last shot is fired and the last tears are shed
Misery, grief and sorrow will follow the dead.
This could resemble so many things, like the spirits of those that died will always linger. That the battlefield will never regain inhabitants etc. And I love that you ended it that way, leaving the reader to think and feel and reflect.
I really can't find anything wrong with this poem, and I can't wait to read more of your work!
Points: 923
Reviews: 82
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