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Writers Block

by Horisun


I write and I write and I write.

I feel good, this is a breeze,

I speed through the page with ease.

Now its time revise.

And my oh my, what have I written?

Oh, the words are chewed and bitten.

And I cry, and I cry.

My grammars a mess! I exclaim.

My dialogue sounds fake,

Was this a mistake?

My outlines held together with bubble gum and tape!

And now, what's this?

Writers block? Oh my!

Is it a condition?

Can it be cured?

Only by me? You say?

That cannot be!

Because I stare a the blank paper,

frustration building.

I can't do this!

I'm awful!

But then again, I think,

Can't leave my characters hanging, now can I?


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20 Reviews


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Sun Sep 20, 2020 12:21 pm
rida wrote a review...



Hi! I want to leave a review. First of all, good luck on getting out of your writer’s block, I had it once too. The poem is nice but I think you exaggerated about the part when you realised your work wasn’t as good as expected. Also, I spotted a grammar mistake

Oh, the words a chewed and bitten.
It should be ‘are chewed and bitten.’
I didn’t spot any other mistakes, keep writing!




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Fri Jan 25, 2019 1:10 am
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ThomMLP02 wrote a review...



Hello, Horisun! This seems to remind me of the Spongebob Squarepants episode "Procrastination" where Spongebob virtually has to write a essay about what not to do at a stoplight. He basically gets one word...ONE word down, which is 'The,' and that's pretty much it. He then dozes off, and starts to have his imagination get the better of him. All kinds of people and objects - Patrick, the mailman, the tv, his chair, his clock, and his candle-fire - come to life, to remind him that he has an essay to write. Then it starts going crazy [ his house catches fire, asking "Why did you set me on fire, Spongebob?!" It was a nightmare...really good episode if you haven't seen it.

I really like the line about the outlines being held together by bubblegum and tape. It probably wouldn't look too good. Thanks for writing a great poem about something that happens with every writer! -ThomMLP02




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Mon Jan 07, 2019 3:50 am
lemonayyde wrote a review...



Hey Horisun!

I must say, I'm on the same boat you are- this poem really captures what it is like to reread what you had been working on! My only comment is that at the beginning, the line "Now its time revise" seems like it should be "Now its time to revise." I couldn't tell if it was intentional though, to poke fun at there being a mistake in the part about revision.

Either way, I absolutely love this poem and good luck with getting out of your writer's block!


-lemonayyde




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Sat Jan 05, 2019 12:29 pm
FlamingPhoenix wrote a review...



Hi Shikora here with a review.

To be honest I can't find anything wrong with this poem, It's just a work of art. I really like how you start the poem, it's very smooth and it gets us hooked. And the name just adds to the pile. It kind of makes us the reader wonder what is in store for us.

And the funny thing is is that your words couldn't be anymore true. It gave me a good laugh. It was also really nice that some of your words rimed with each other, it gave a really good feeling to it, it made reading it smooth. I also like it that you used question marks, and exclamation marks, it just put a hull new feeling into the writing. Me being the reader it's good that I can feel how you feel through your writing.

The best part of the poem was when you went from writing to having know ideas at all, it was really good how you did that, you didn't just jump right into it. You did it slowly and made it dramatic, it was really fun to read.

I really enjoyed reading and reviewing this for you, It was nice to see that your such a great writer. I hope you have a great day/night, and never stop writing.

Your friend
Shikora. :D




Horisun says...


Thank you so much!





Your welcome! :D



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Sat Jan 05, 2019 6:19 am
Redbox275 wrote a review...



This is very cute!
I wrote something with a similar idea about procrastination.

I like the tone it maintains, and I feel like it hits all the feelings about writer's block. (Also right on for writing a novel).

I would recommend using syntax more intentionally to convey certain ideas. In the beginning, you had "I write I write" without punctuation, which imitates this flow state of mind when just writing. I would make the initial lines smoother and more articulate to emulate this idea confidence. Also I think the shorter sentences create this tone of frustration which you sometimes do, but I think it should be more frequent. Also, I'd suggest more detail on the internal "building frustration".

Anyway, it looks really cool, and it was relatable. Keep writing!

Good luck!




Horisun says...


Thanks for the review!




Seeing is believing, but feeling is the truth.
— Thomas Fuller