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And You Thought Writers Block Was Bad?

by Horisun


I tapitty tap my pen as the teacher drones on.

Something about using weed killer in our school lawn.

I drone in and out,

When my brain seems to shout,

HEY!

We're going to write today!

The King of the Hill,

Who gave out a one hundred dollar bill!

Or an alternate dimension,

With people made of tin!

A broken hearted Queen,

Who is actually a pre-teen!

A girl named Jortal,

Who falls into a portal.

Somebody named Jude,

Who meets an elf that's rude.

But wait, which one to write first?

I have that writing thirst.

Can't decide... Can't choose...

This is a lose-lose.

I guess it's better than writers block.


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509 Reviews


Points: 269
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Sun Sep 15, 2019 10:32 pm
Magestorrow wrote a review...



Hey there, Horisun! I'm back again for another review.

Us writers always talk about how much writer's block sucks, but we rarely talk about the opposite problem: having too much to write about! As someone who frequently struggles with way too many ideas, I very much enjoyed your fun little poem.

I don't usually say this about poetry, but one of the best parts of your poem was your rhyming scheme - it was fun trying to guess what you would rhyme with the ending word in the line before, and then being completely taken by surprise when I saw what you had actually picked. The rhymes you ended up going with were both innovative and wacky, which is something I'm always a fan of.

The only critique I have is that the examples you gave might have been a little forced - some of them flowed better than others. But nothing you used in your poem needs to definitely be changed - it works very well if you never end up revising it.

Overall, I really loved how you tackled this topic! The variety of ideas that narrator gets and their struggle to pick which one to work on was a very relatable situation, and the ending conclusion is something I wholeheartedly agree with. It's definitely better than writer's block, but just by a little.

(Also, as a quick aside: "writers block" should be "writer's block", since the block belongs to the writer.)

Great job on this poem.

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25 Reviews


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Sat Sep 14, 2019 6:45 pm
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Anamel wrote a review...



Relatable and funny in both ways. I honestly think leaving in that part about weed killer is fine, I can tell that it's just meaning what the teacher is droning on about. Although, maybe you could italicize HEY so it's emphazied even more. It's simple but also entertaining. I don't think you need to switch up anything besides that one tiny thing and that it's good the way it is. The title also draws readers in because you're asking a question and they want to find out what's supposedly worse than writer's block. It's easy to space out in class and imagine possible storylines and all that stuff.




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Sat Sep 14, 2019 6:03 pm
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Necromancer14 wrote a review...



Haha, this was hilarious. I like the theme, and you did it really well.

"I tapitty tap my pen as the teacher drones on.
Something about using weed killer in our school lawn."

What? This first line confused me. It doesn't have much to do with the rest of the poem, and it is kind of just random. There's nothing really that wrong about it, it's just feels random with the rest of the poem.

"I have that writing thirst."

I like this part. It does a great job at explaining what the writer is thinking, with their desire to write something.

"I guess it's better than writers block."

This part was great. Just the sort of "sure, I guess," feeling is perfect, and putting the italics in to emphasize the word "guess" really brings it out.

I really enjoyed reading this. The title is witty, and the silly ideas that the person has are great. Keep writing!





"I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school... I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy..."
— Unnamed Girl from "Mean Girls"