Young Writers Society

I swear I reviewed this.
I guess I didn't.

This was a lovely poem, and I especially like the title, which drew me into it. I'm afraid that I'm not quite sure what some of these lines are saying.
Let me review what I think you said:
Stanza one is about rebellion, I believe. That's the best summary I can give it.
Stanza two is our first introduction to this mysterious girl, and how she is like copper. Since the copper was used in the first stanza to convey rebellion, I have to believe that this girl is the symbol for rebellion in the narrator's life.
I have a hard time understanding the third stanza. All I know is that we're comparing her to copper again. But I feel like the third stanza is a pivotal stanza to understanding this poem. It IS the stanza right before our attention shifts, so it should be the transition stanza.
I love the fourth stanza (& the line above it, which I'll count as part of the stanza). It is probably my favorite stanza because it's so simple and clear, and I can relate to the emotion expressed in it.
The last two lines really bring the whole poem together. Although I wish you could somehow squeeze in there the idea that copper is an orangy color so we can have another connection to the copper.

I get most of this, just not really the third stanza.


I love the imagery that you use through all this, and I especially love the casual, but intense tone that you had. It's perfect for the subject and theme. The rhythm seemed good, and even the "mistakes" that aren't mistakes at all were wonderful.
I really have nothing to actually tell you to fix. But if you told me what you were trying to say in the third stanza, I might have something to say about that. I don't know.

Ooh actually, other than comparing her to copper, to rebellion, and describing her, I'm not quite sure what the purpose of the second stanza was. Not that you need any other reasons for having it: it's obviously not a useless stanza, and I think the "Y'know" really helps the tone.

Well, great job as always! I hope this green room rescue was an adequate enough review!
~fortis

Hey there! How are ya? Purple here to give you a review! Let's get down to business.
This is a very interesting poem. I like your mention or copper and oranges. In the first stanza with the drifting lines, I would suggest omitting this. It has a separate thing going on and mixes up the idea in the reader's mind. Also, the line "Y'know her hair is made of copper" seems a little off. Maybe change the y'know and have this line be "I admire her copper hair" or something along the lines of that. Other than that, this is definitely an interesting piece. Keep it up and have a good day!
~Purple