Perched upon the ivory, lips kiss the poison as it trickles down their throat
too kind for their own good
Pinpricks of pain that they swallow whole, thorn buds explode in their chests
mutating into the nettles themselves
Reaps the darkness from the colour that is today
seeds of evil circulate like pollen
Locks away the machines of yesterday
the metal rusts and infects the soil of tomorrow
Unearths the weeds of the future
they are buried too deep that a shovel can dig
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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125,027 Literary Works • 672,774 Reviews
This poem is... RIDICULOUSLY beautiful. I'm getting the feeling it was meant to be about Snow White? I love the ambiguity, though. The way you've formatted it, small statements of truth crossed out and whispered after each line, are stunning. Your figurative language (and specifically personification) is lovely, and your imagery really brings the reader into the scene you describe. So much is said in each and every line, and each word is so uniquely placed to the one next to it- a lovely diction. This poem was very real and beautiful, and you should definitely be proud!!
Aww thanks so much!! Glad you enjoyed it!
Oh my gosh. huh wow. I don't quite know how to make this review sound professional because just wow. This is VERY good.
Once again you have used a format I've never seen before. And you've pulled it off exceptionally well. The words of your poem flow so eloquently. Am I correct in thinking this has a bit of a double meaning?
also the line "seeds of evil circulate like pollen" I love that, great imagery. Actually you use great imagery all the way through it.
Aww, thanks! And the double meaning was exactly what I was going for!
Ah thought so! Nice work
Great work!
Thanks!
Great work!