No longer would she wear, her old skirts and dresses
Made to fit her forgotten fetishes
No longer would she put on make-up and mascara
To wear her beauty like a tiara.
No longer would she go out with her friends
And dance with strange men.
No longer would she wear high heels and a tight-fitting bra
And go to adult bars
No longer would she do these things
To appease the smiles of strangers
For now her skirts and dresses
Are always knee-length
For now her face is naked and bare
With crimson tears as her heart's content
For now her friends come round to her home
And she does the cha cha with them
For now she wears trainers and hoodies
And jogs in the morning without people looking
For now,
She would prefer
To stay away from him.
For now,
She will never
Love again.
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Canary word: Present
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139,389 Literary Works • 672,542 Reviews
I really liked the way you narrated the poem but it lacks impressive or heart winning words and sentences. You are not wrong in anyway, except silly punctuation mistakes but I would love to see a tiny little improve ment in your choice of words.
I wasn't much willing to write a review at this point of the night but your poem about would actually draw anyone and would actually force them to write a review.
I really hope to read amazing content from you in coming days. You do have the potential but you just need to channelize your writing potential and after that I can say and I do believe you will get quite a good amount of fame.
I hope my review helps you and you do concentrate on the former by reading more books and developing your vocabulary.
Thank you.
Bye!!!!
Thank you for your review
no. i couldn't resist myself from reviewing it. although I am not having that time, but I will try to provide you with an honest review.
well, i was quite confused about the reason of why she would never do all this again until the last. but when you revealed it, it was awesome. i genuinely liked your poem. you nailed it as usual. i have a few suggestions to give-
put a comma after now.
same case. put a comma after now
put a comma after now. the same as the earlier ones
you do have a great potential as a writer. keep it up.
i hope I have provided you with a good and honest review. these are mere suggestions. it's your choice that you will take it or not.
bye!!!
Thank you so much for your review, that's so kind of you
welcome
it's awesome. i will review when when possible