It would be really cool,
if trees could swing.
Well no, actually,
it would be quite awkward and hard,
if a tree could swing.
Especially if you're the one pushing.
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138,940 Literary Works • 672,331 Reviews
Hello dear,
ab me kya batao tujhe ki tune kitna aacha likha h. Par dusro ko uski kadar nhi h. Banda chati class me iss se behtar aur kya likh sakta hai. Tu bas chalne de bahut mast likha h chalne de. Lovable idea.shanti hu baith jaia kar aur pach kuch na kuch likh diya kar bike baad tan apneaap kuch choko so panna par aa jaiya si.
Hi!
I don't really know what to think of this. It's cute, and I'm glad that I read the description that said you wrote it in sixth grade.
If you wanted to improve on this, I would like to see it turned into more of a fantasy situation. Like a kid swinging from the branches of the tree and then the tree says, "hey, kid, can I have a turn?" And then the kid offers to push the tree and so forth. Make it longer and into a narrative poem. Maybe the kid is surprised to know that trees can talk.
In addition, I think this would be more effective if it rhymed. Usually, I don't recommend adding rhyme, but here, it would improve the strange humor of the piece.
This made me chuckle. ^_^ I hope you continue to write little funny poems like these! Happy writing!
Oh, that would be a cool idea... I might try that!
Thanks for the review! 
First off, really cool title!
second off, the content is really confusing. It's really cute but I think you need to add a bit more. lol
Hey there SnazzyPencil. Just lizzy stopping by for a quick review. Well let the reviewing begin.
- Let me start with what I liked. First off, your title. The title was the reason I checked out your poem in the first place. It was the content though that convinced me I needed to write a review. The question, if trees could swing, draws the reader in because it is such an odd idea. Thank you for this point.
- Second, the length. Your poem is a bit short which for me caused some confusion. As soon as I started to grab the crazy idea of the poem it ended. I didn't like that but that doesn't really matter.
- Third, my least favorite part of reviewing, the grammar and spelling. Thank you for being one of the people who proofread before posting. I didn't see any errors in this category.
Like I said it would just be a quick review.
-lizzy
*If there are any spelling mistakes, please ignore for this review was done on mobile.
Thanks for the review!
I love this this is so cute !
Love this!!!!! Thought it was a little shorter than in used to but it's great nonetheless!!!!!
Hello.
This poem is quite humorous and kinda confusing. Also you are 250th review.
Even though it is a short poem, these seemed to have the important stuff unless, of course, it is just words without a rhyme and whatnot. It seems a little weird in the middle, with the sudden realization as thinking that a moving tree is weird. I think of some wind moving a tree, the branches slightly blowing in the fall weather.
Seems a bit... sudden? Although you can keep it, I would suggest trying to think of a better sudden thought as to why it would be weird for trees to move. I liked the repetition of "if trees could swing" (this seems to be like a shel silverstein poem, I read sometime ago-- of course, I don't remember the name).
I can kinda tell this was written in sixth grade, with the small uses of thought and tone. However, you have grown from that.
I liked this poem, and seemed to be another favorite out of the poems I've read from you. Continue to write these humorous poems, Penicillin. Become the next Shel Silverstein. XP
Blaspherica
Even if you wrote this in sixth grade, it is kinda funny.