I don't like this for the following reasons.
The first question is why. Why did you make this? It's supposed to be an endearing birthday poem but the rhyming reminds me of Dr. Seuss. It doesn't work well since Dr. Seuss is aimed at kids, yet you're aiming at an audience of young adults. You aren't doing a good job at impressing adults, because this seems like you wrote this for the sake of writing it, or getting likes. Likes aren't good. Growing as a writer is. Grow as a writer. Please.
thanks.
Points: 0
Reviews: 60
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