Camp Tornado: Part Three

by Horisun

Published November 6, 2020

E - Everyone

In 2018-2020 Stuff

Wordcount: 2095

“So, I was thinking, we go check out that trail right there.” Talia pointed at a path on a map. “We just have to ask a Counselor to chaperone us.” Said Talia, “We don’t have any activities today, so we’re free to do whatever we want.”

Talia looked around, and her eyes landed on the guy who had handed out Cabin Assignments.
“One moment,” she handed the map to Darion, and made her way over to him. It didn’t take long for him to nod, and walk over to them.

“So, you all are thinking of hiking the Dragons Tail Trail?”

“What a fun name.” Darion smiled, “Where is it again?”

“Up in the North West side.” He said.

Darion shuffled a little, but his expression didn’t shift, “That’s near the Lake, isn’t it?”

“Close to that, but we’re not going there.” He picked up a backpack, “My name is Davie, by the way.”

They followed Davie out of the Camp, filled with Kids playing tag and playing games, out onto a narrow path, a lot like the one they used to get to the camp.

The scenery was gorgeous, June had to admit, even though she was being eaten alive by bugs, and sweat was dripping down her back.
There was a waterfall trickling down ivy covered rocks, into a stream that lead North. Much to her annoyance, Davie helped her over it.

She shot a glare at him as he smiled at her. There was something weird about him, that was for sure.
June glanced over at Talia, who kept glancing down at the map, and then her watch, and then the sky.

June shuffled over to her, “What’s going on?”

Talia jumped, “Nothing.”

And they continued like that for the next hour or so, Talia being unusually quiet, her Notebook tucked snugly in her pocket, and her pencil still.

Finally, “I have to use the bathroom.”

Davie turned around to face Talia, “Did you go before you left?”

“No.” Talia grimaced, her eyes wide, “I forgot.”

Davie sighed, “Ok, you can try to go in the bushes. Be careful.” He looked over at June, “You go with her, watch out for wild animals.”

Darion was squinting at the two of them, “Well we’re stopping, I have to go too.”

Davie looked conflicted, “Fine, but be quick.”

“It won’t be.” Talia muttered as she passed him. Davie shifted uncomfortably.

Once they were out of earshot, Darion stopped, “Ok, where are we actually going?”

Talia sighed, “Was I that obvious? I thought I did a good job.”

“I think Davies just really gullible.” June laughed. “So, spill.

Talia glanced back towards the trail, “I want to check out the Lake.” She grabbed each of their hands, and pulled them Westward, “It’s not far from here. I studied the map, and calculated the point where we’d be closest to it, and what time we’d get there.”

“You have nerve, Tallfield.” Darion said, “Not sure if I’m impressed, or terrified.”

“Well I’m definitely the latter.” June stood her ground, “Won’t Davie come check on us?”

“Not if we’re quick, he won’t. This is just a… Recon mission.” Talia backed away, “We’ll be back so fast, he’ll hardly-“

And then Talia tripped, and disappeared down a cliff.

“Amy!” Darion and June shouted, rushing forward.

“I’m Ok! It wasn’t that- Ow.”
June shuffled near the edge, and peered down. It was about a six foot drop, but there was a lot of soft underbrush. Talia was struggling to her feet, and giving a small thumbs up.
“So it turns out maps aren’t 3D. I can still scale that on my way back.” She winced as she looked up at them. “Maybe…”

“Should we go back and get Davie?” Darion called.

“No, no… It’s fine.”

June nudged Darion, and pointed towards the pile of rocks, not so far from them, that could be used like steps down toward Talia.

He nodded, and they clambered down, June a tad slower, watching out for loose stones, and thinking before she stepped down.

Talia looked torn between laughing and crying, but she just stood up straighter, “On with the quest!”
She pulled out her notebook, and started scribbling as she walked forward, Darion and June shrugging, before following behind her. Her nose still stuck in her writing.

The heroes power onward, despite the small hiccup, to discover the malicious plot of Ms. Kemble.

“Pft.” June smirked.

“What?” Talia asked, grinning, “That’s what we are! And I’m certain we’re going to uncover some mysterious evil.”

“Totally.” Darion said, checking his watch, “And we are also going to uncover what happens to children who run off from their chaperone. I’m sure he’s checked on us now.”

“We’re almost there, though!” Cried Talia, “It should be just beyond this tree!”

She put on a burst of speed, and twirled around it. Only to come to a halt. Her pencil thudded to the ground as her arms went limp. Her eyes widened so much, she almost looked like a Cartoon character.

“What is it?” June asked, walking up to stand beside her, Darion close behind.
Then, she looked up to see what Talia was staring at.
“Oh… Oh wow.”

The lake was a shade of black that made it look like a gaping hole. It was so still. It didn’t ripple when the too-cold wind blew, nor when the waves washed silently onto the banks, it just slid, back and forth, across the deep gray rocks.
But that wasn’t what Talia was staring at. In the very center of the lake, (For, June only now noticed, was perfectly round) a tower burst from its depths. It was taller than any building Talia had ever, or would ever, see.
It might’ve once been Crystal white, but now it was dusty and gray. Pieces of it were crumbling off, falling into the Lake below, only to sink silently.
Balconies protruded at random points, some large enough to cast a shadow on the lake, (If the lake could have shadows) And others were barred off, as so much of it had crumbled, one step out would send you plummeting into the Black Hole beneath.

It was horrendously beautiful. Perfect, yet broken beyond repair.

“What is that?” Darion asked, seemingly awestruck.

“It’s terrifying.” Talia gasped, stumbling forward to get a better look, “What is that? Why haven’t we seen it from Camp? That’s taller than the Empire State Building! Does Ms. Kemble know about it?”

“Looks like it.” June said, pulling Talia back behind the trees. “Because she’s rowing towards it right now.”

They ducked behind a warped tree, and watched as Ms. Kembels hunched figure sat in a boat, as a long, skeletal figure rowed along.

“Well, Talia.” Said June, biting her lip, “You wanted to discover Ms. Kembels evil plot.”

Chapter Five: Discussing Pure Evil

They watched as the boat swam closer, and closer, to the tower, until Ms. Kemble rose from it, and stepped inside, out of view.

For a moment, they stared after her, then Talia stood up, “Alright, let’s follow her.”

Darion and June looked up at her, alarmed, “We can’t do that!” Darion cried, “First of all, I don’t think June can even swim!” For a moment, she was mildly offended, but then she nodded.

“Fair enough.”

Darion continued, “Second of all, that clearly isn’t normal water, and we don’t even know how deep it is.” Darion took a breath, “And thirdly-“

“You’ll be in huge trouble with the camp.”
They all whirled around, and saw Davie standing behind them. Slightly scraped up, but glaring heavily.
“What on Earth were you thinking, pulling a stunt like that! If Mother had seen you-“

“Mother?” June asked, glancing at Talia.

“Ms. Kemble.” Davie said bashfully. “If she had seen you, you’d all be dead.” He looked around at all of them, “That was a Hyperbole.” He paused, “And the Lake of Evil Souls is incredibly dangerous!”

“That doesn’t look like any lake I’ve ever seen.” Talia said, “That looks more like a hole in the spacetime continuum.”

Davie shook his head, “Come on, we’re going back to camp.” He turned around, and then added, “And don’t breathe a word about this to anyone, especially not Ms. Kemble.”

They all nodded, but as they walked away, Talia shot the lake a look that said, I’ll be back for you.

When Talia walked into the hut with June and Darion, the only one there was Leaf, they were sitting on the couch, reading.

“Hey- Oh my god, Talia! What happened to you?”

“Does it really look that bad?” Talia asked, squirming.

“You have a giant scratch across your cheek, how’d you not notice that?” Leaf cried, and then turned to face June and Darion, “And you two are coated in mud.”

“We went on a hike.” Darion laughed.

Leaf shook their head, and went back to reading, “It looks like you’ve been through the wars and back.”

“Where is everyone?” Darion asked, sitting down across from Leaf.

“Flower went to go get snacks to bring back to the cabin, Draco went to take a nap,” They rolled their eyes, “And Jacobs still playing on that DS of his. I have a feeling he doesn’t really want to be here.”

“And you do?” June asked.

Leaf sighed, “Not really, but Flower was coming, so I kinda had too.”

“Fair enough,” June said, as Talia spoke.

“Guess where we went?”

June shot her a look, and Leaf raised an eyebrow.
“On a hike?” They asked.

“To the lake.

This time, both their eyebrows shot up. “Wait, I though the most important rule was-“

“Never go to the lake.” They all said in unison.

“Yeah, that.” Talia said, “And you’ll never believe what was there.”

“A box that contains my self confidence? I think I dropped it somewhere.”

Talia laughed, “No, an evil tower.

And now you’re all just pulling my leg.” They closed their book, and stood up. “If you excuse me, I’m going to go take a nap.” They looked between the two rooms, before sighing, and walking into the boys dorm.

June rolled her eyes, “Didn’t Davis just tell us not to tell anyone?”

“But we need to tell people, in case she does find out we saw her, and… And wipe our minds, or something.”
June just stared, and Talia groaned, “Come on, guys, there is clearly something sinister going on here.”

June stood up, “I’m going to go get some dinner. It’s getting pretty late.”

And with that, June left the Cabin.

Chapter Six: A Fine Picnic Spot

Talia lay atop the bunk. June snore, (Quite loudly) Beneath her.

But that wasn’t why she couldn’t fall asleep. No, she had much more important things on her mind.

Like what was in that Tower? Why did the Lake look like a gaping hole into the underworld?
And what was Ms. Kemble up to?

Talia was burning with questions from the inside out. The idea of sneaking out back to the lake was tempting. But every time she considered it, she heard her Mothers voice in her head.

Don’t even THINK about bending the rules.

Its too dark now, wait before going out.

The forest is dangerous, never go out alone.

Just as she had that thought, she heard voices in the Room next door.
They were so quiet, had Talia even been half asleep, she would have missed them for sure.

She stood up, and slid down the ladder, landing as quietly as she could on the floor.

Talia recognized Dariens and Dracos voices now. She heard a door creep open, and the howl of the wind outside.

They’re sneaking out! Did Darien tell Draco about the tower? Is that where they’re going?
Come on, Darien, you know I’d go with you for sure!

“Good midnight to you both.” Talia said, leaning against the couch, for dramatic effect. “Where are you both off to?”

Draco and Darien froze at the door. Darien, who was already outside, stepped back in, closing the door shut.

“It’s not what it looks like!” Draco said, taking several steps back towards his room.

“You two are sneaking out to go to the tower, aren’t you?” Cried Talia, “I’m coming too! Let me grab my bag! One moment!”

She rushed back into her room, as Draco shot a panicked look at Darien.

Mother would say not to go alone. And now I’m going with them, so what’s the worst that could happen? She thought as she packed a granola bar into her bag.

Comments & reviews · 2
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DreamyAlice
Review
DreamyAlice wrote a review Review · Jan 5, 2021

Hey Alice here to review!

As I said in the previous chapter review the story is growing more interesting .And my favorite character is ofcourse Talia I like her adventurous and fun character. Now let's review

Chapter-4

“So, you all are thinking of hiking the Dragons Tail Trail?”


Well that is actually a fun name.

Talia looked around, and her eyes landed on the guy who had handed out Cabin Assignments.


I think the 'Cabin Assignment' should be in small cabin assignments.

There was a waterfall trickling down ivy covered rocks, into a stream that lead North


The lake was a shade of black that made it look like a gaping hole. It was so still. It didn’t ripple when the too-cold wind blew, nor when the waves washed silently onto the banks, it just slid, back and forth, across the deep gray rocks.


You have written a very good descriptions of the sceneries.

Pieces of it were crumbling off, falling into the Lake below, only to sink silently.


I think the 'Lake' shouldn't be capitalized everywhere.


Chapter-5

“What on Earth were you thinking, pulling a stunt like that! If Mother had seen you-“


You have made it quite obvious that this Ms. Kemble and the boy Davie are mother and son and I am becoming more curious what on earth are they both hiding.


And I must say your diologues are well written.

When Talia walked into the hut with June and Darion, the only one there was Leaf, they were sitting on the couch, reading.


The only one in the hut was Leaf so there shouldn't be 'they'.


Chapter-6



Don’t even THINK about bending the rules.

Its too dark now, wait before going out.

The forest is dangerous, never go out alone


It was a unique idea to write these.

Talia recognized Dariens and Dracos voices now


Its a possesive noun so it should be Darien's and Draco's.


Well my review is done!
I hope it is useful.

Bye!!!!

spunkyspacekitty wrote a review Review · Jan 1, 2021

Hi! Spunky here to review.

Grows:

Talia being unusually quiet, her Notebook tucked snugly in her pocket, and her pencil still.

"Notebook" shouldn't be capitalized.

“I think Davies just really gullible.” June laughed.

"Davies" should be "Davie's since you are saying Davie IS gullible, instead of saying multiple Davies are gullible.

“Amy!” Darion and June shouted, rushing forward.

Since "Amy" told everyone to call her "Talia" and everyone called her Talia after that, it seems odd that they would say Amy instead of Talia.

[quote“What on Earth were you thinking, pulling a stunt like that! If Mother had seen you-“[/quote]
This is stylistic, but I don't think "Earth" should be capitalized.

“That looks more like a hole in the spacetime continuum.”

"spacetime" should be "space/time"

June snore, (Quite loudly) Beneath her.

"Beneath" should be lowercase, and "June snore" isn't correct. "June snores" or some kind of variant would work.

Glows:

[quoteThe lake was a shade of black that made it look like a gaping hole. It was so still. It didn’t ripple when the too-cold wind blew, nor when the waves washed silently onto the banks, it just slid, back and forth, across the deep gray rocks.

But that wasn’t what Talia was staring at. In the very center of the lake, (For, June only now noticed, was perfectly round) a tower burst from its depths. It was taller than any building Talia had ever, or would ever, see.

It might’ve once been Crystal white, but now it was dusty and gray. Pieces of it were crumbling off, falling into the Lake below, only to sink silently.[/quote]
Wow...that description is so...awesome. The only thing is...Crystal should be lowercase XD.

Bye for now!



I AM ONE WITH MUSHROOMS
— inksthewriter