Ala slumped in her chair, and she seemed to take on a staring contest with the head teacher, Mr. Dude. His actual name was Mr. Plum, but he preferred to be called Dude, because he was the only male worker in the daycare.
Ala focused on these details, for if she didn't, she would've curled into a ball, and cried her eye balls out.
"Can you tell us why you did that, Ala?"
She glared at him, and stuck up her head in defiance. It would've been perfect, if she didn't let out a sniffle. "My lips are sealed." Ala heard the door swing open behind her, and heard someone shout,
"ALA!" she bent her head in shame as her Mommy stormed into the room. She felt her Mommy glare at her, before she scolded, "What made you think that was a good idea?" She glanced up and saw her Mom was shaking with laughter.
The Head Teacher looked at her Mommy with a funny look, but Ala's Mommy just shook her head, and said, "I'm sorry, but it's just too funny!"
The Head Teacher seemed speechless. "Ma'am, are you not mad?"
"Oh, yes, I am very mad," She laughed again. "I'll take her home now, and we'll have a long talk about it."
Ala blushed furiously as she walked past the cafeteria to the exit. She felt the weight of everyone's stares on her shoulders, and even heard whispers of conversation. She wanted to run and never come back.
She swung the car door open, and plopped down in her car seat, buckling herself without a word.
They drove in silence for a long, long moment. Ala wanted to sink to the core of the Earth, and melt through the other half, and fall through space, where no one would find her.
"Aren't you going to yell at me?" Ala finally asked.
"No, Ala, I'm not."
"You're not mad?"
"I am, Ala, very, but I think you've learned your lesson."
Ala wiped imaginary sweat off her face, and let out a huge sigh.
"I have something important to tell you, Ala.
Ala froze.
"We're moving."
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Since this has been at the bottom of the green room for a while, I decided I might as well review it.
So here's my review:
"on a staring contest with the head teacher, Mr. Dude"
Nice intro! You get the idea that this is a humorous story right at the beginning.
"and cried her eye balls out."
"eye" and "balls" are supposed to be one word, "eyeballs."
""We're moving.""
Great ending! I love cliffhangers/sudden reveals, so this was a wonderful ending. It makes one want to read what's next.
This was a great little humorous chapter. (Thankfully I read the previous chapter so I know what Ala did. However, I've not read any chapters before then, so I don't know what drove Ala to sing that little song in the first place.)
Anyway, that's my review! I hope it was helpful
Thanks for the review!
Hey Horisun!
Hope you're doing well today or tonight, depending on what side of the world you're on, obviously. I'm here to give you a review, like I promised yesterday. Let's get started, now, shall we? Alright!
SO FIRSTLY, why did ya take so long?! I waited for ages, mate! But oh well. Let's get this review rollin'.
Ah, her mum is mad, isn't she? Kinda some weirdo witch who's about to, like, present her daughter with a gift for singing about how much her enemy is a poopy pants. Lol. Anyways, continuing...
wAiT wHaT sHe'S mOvInG?! WHAT DID YA DO, HORISUN!
*takes deep breaths*
It's okay. It's cool. But, why is she leaving? What a cliffhanger! You didn't give us any of her emotions about how Ala might be feeling, which was sorta disappointing, but that's okay, right?
I didn't see any mistakes at all, and everything. You did well with all the grammar, punctuation, and all of that. Great job! I don't have much else to say, so I'll wrap up my review. This chapter was a delight to read, and I hope to see the next chapter soon. Of course, if you have any questions, feel free to ask me whenever!
Keep on writing!
~Liberty
Omg, I'm laughing so hard right now! XD
Thanks for the review!
Lol, of course!