I have acquired writer's block...
I can't even write about a sock;
And if I attempt to rhyme,
I find that I lose my time.
I discover myself in a box,
Where all I see are ticking clocks.
Crumbled papers surround me,
And my words can't roam free.
Night comes around--I'm still lost,
My feelings of despair I have glossed.
My irritation begins to grow...
And now I've come to know:
I can't get myself out--
But my pen tries yet another route.
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138,941 Literary Works • 672,335 Reviews
Hello writer , I completely loved your poem and it brought a smile on my face. It is just so relatable that I am sure every writer must have enjoyed reading your work. It is written so effortlessly that it shows the random thoughts are being written here and that brings to the goodness of the poem because no attempts are made to make it look fancy with heavy words or anything, you just wrote what you felt and i must say it is a very good quality. Humour is high in your poem and I must say its really a unique poem. Keep writing and keep writing such unique poems.Sorry fir a short review and hope my review was useful to you in any way.
Urvika
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Great poem! I especially love how you wrote about something that most people can relate to. That's what a great writer would've done. A great writer would attempt at touching the people at the heart. And that's what you did!
I love how the rhyme scheme is simple. It helped me concentrate on reading the poem for what it was for. And clearly, as it's stated in the title, the poem is about "writer's block". The way you used the words that you chose definitely fit the poem. You couldn't have put this piece together any better.
I found a liking for the imagery that you portrayed in this piece. For example, the line "Crumpled papers surround me," really caught me. It was something I can go back to. Because I think that almost every writer has suffered, or even slightly encountered, the curse that is "writer's block".
Very great penmanship! Please, stay true to your name and... Keepwriting.
-Payds
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Hey there, Keepwriting!!!
This poem is really cute and I can agree with a lot of the things you say. I really like how you use Imagery to descibe a literal box. I also think theres a nice little paradox when you rhymed the sentences 'And i I attempt to rhyme, I find that I lose my time.' There are a few things I would improve, or maybe not. ( I`m indecisive).
The first was saying ' I have aquired writers block.' I feel like the rest of the poem is more figureative, except for that one line. The other was that you ended pretty abruptly; I feel like the poem was finished at' I can`t get myself out', And ' My mind filled with unruly doubt' was from somewhere earlier in the poem. Its a bit out of place. I guess you could switch the last two lines, and change the line before that a bit. Just to make it less abrupt. The advice I give is just ideas I had, and maybe their kinda weird, but if you like `em, use `em!!
Lucy;p
Okay, I changed this so much hope you guys like it!
Joke: What do you do when you have writer's block?
You Keepwriting
Spoiler
(Sorry, I couldn't help it. Anyway, onto the review ~ )
As I was reading your work, the first thing I noticed after the title was the awkward rhyme pattern you have going on. From the first stanza, I think you're trying to rhyme lines one and three, but as I go on reading, you transfer to rhyming the second and third lines of each stanza. It's inconsistent and distracting, and I would recommend fixing this up.
Your poem has good ideas circulating--ironically. I mean, you're on the cusp of having a few good metaphors to work with. Like the"tiny box" you mention in the first stanza. Or something with losing the rhythm of writing (maybe there's a figurative relationship to music in there). Or "being stuck", perhaps like glue. The problem is, you stuff all of these vague, little snippets altogether in the first stanza. You toss a bunch of vague ideas in my head, but never explicate or finish them. I would suggest picking one central metaphor to start with. That way you aren't so all-over-the-place.
Writer's block is overused as a writing topic, on this site particularly; I myself have written an article about possible ways to overcome it. Reading this, I have no idea what you're trying to communicate that hasn't been communicated already. Why do you want to write? Do you want to say something in particular to somebody? Who's your audience? What exactly are you trying to tell your reader, and what kind of reaction do you want to elicit from them? You've heard these questions before. I know this is nothing new. But you might want to think harder about the answers. Because it seems to me as if the sole message you're trying to get across here is: "Writer's block sucks. It's hard to get rid of." Which is painfully obvious, so you have to work twice as hard to make your poem something original and fresh to your reader. You didn't do that. I feel like I could put "writer's block" into the search bar and come up with at least 100 results. Probably more.
If you're writing about writer's block exclusively because you have a case of it: don't. Write about something else. I hate to burst your bubble, but while writing about writer's block might give you ideas of other things to spend your time writing, and it might be therapeutic for you, I don't want to read about it. I'm not your only reader, and that's also something you should consider; you don't have to take any of my suggestions. But my personal opinion is that this lacks both originality and appeal. My suggestion would be to either find a different and more avant-garde way to execute this idea, or to abandon it altogether and go with something else.
Best of wishes,
Savvy
I changed this up a lot please give me your opinion.
Okay, I see you've changed things up a bit. The rhyme pattern is much better, so that's commendable. But I stand by the rest of my review; this is still very jumpy and inconsistent; there are eight lines with three separate and unconnected metaphors. Like I said, I'd stick with one. Or at least transition between them more smoothly.
Also, like I said before, this still doesn't stick out to me as anything particularly original. Personally, I would either elongate / creatively elaborate a little on this, or, like I said in my review, just go with something different.
Hopefully I'm making some sense, and hopefully my criticism is constructive for you. I'd be glad to be of more assistance, and to answer any questions further in depth at a later time; it's just that right now I happen to be in class. If you shoot me a PM or a message in chat, maybe we can talk more about poetry. ^^
Have a nice day!
Ha. This is exactly what I'm feeling right now.
To begin with, it's a very good poem about a very common issue (at least common in this microcosm).
Now, if you're going for logical statements and grammatical correctness, you hit the figurative nail on the head.
Personally, this feels like an essay (which is not a problem because of how well written it is), but this has the potential to be so poetic!
---
Let's start with the first line: Never start a first line with "sometimes," it's been done to death and immediately detracts from the gravitas of the work. When writing a poem, you want the reader to FEEL IT (cue Shulk) even if the feeling never occurred to them prior to reading.
Try this, "You feel your (blood pressure increasing, heartbeat quickening, throat closing, etc)," and other descriptors make the reader feel it as they read.
"As if crammed in a little, tiny box." (Double descriptors and figurative scenario.)
"Seemingly unable to be unstuck."
"Seemingly unable to find the rhythm." (Repetition is good in a poem, and I'm trying to keep it here, but writing in second person and with questions is always weird.)
-
"Of course, this feeling is quite common."
"Many experience this 'writers' block.'"
(Given the third line is obscure for the sake of a rhyme, I'm trying to fix that.
"It cannot be resolved by the ticking of a clock."
"Is there no cure?"
-
"It came in the blackness of night,"
"Hit me earlier today."
"But now I've come here to say,"
"'There is (watch contractions in writing. They either work if they don't.) no cure for writers' block!'"
---
Of course, this is how I would do it, so it's entirely up to you as to what you change, revise, and keep. There are entirely suggestions, and they come from my mind, so don't feel obligated to change if your vision for it isn't mine, because you're the author, and your vision is the ONLY one that matters.
I changed this a lot please give me your opinion