A Souls Heaven 2-A Poem Serial

by EverLight

Published April 10, 2018

E - Everyone

In Drafts & Poems

Come see four kittens,

grey as stone marked with white,

safe under their mothers care.

Look at all the love mother has for her

daughters and sons,

as they curl by her side, snug and warm.  

 Look again, all but one are gone, 

only the sweetest one remains. 

The kitten with fur grey as the dawn sky,

with patches of snowy white.

Look at her joy!

She knows she is loved,

You can hear it in her soft meow,

You can see it gazing into her loving golden eyes,

You can behold it in her sweet, joyous face. 

Yes, she knows this is her family forever,

she knows she is home sweet home.

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
riles
Review
riles wrote a review Review · Apr 24, 2018

Awesome poem! It was very heart warming, as I myself love cats! You had some really awesome descriptions. I could definitely envision the cat as if it was right here next to me.

The only critique I have is that the line “look at her joy!” feels a little off. The placement of the exclamation mark could be what is throwing me off.

Overall, I enjoyed this poem.

Nice work!

Glad you loved it!

User avatar
fishsashimi
Review
fishsashimi wrote a review Review · Apr 10, 2018

Hey Onii-Chan here!

I’ll tell you this: I love cats. My grandparents have a bunch of farm cats and I’ve seen 12 hour old kittens grow all the way up to 5 year olds. I think that the way you describe a mother cat taking care of her kittens is great! My only criticism is that the flow of the poem feels bumpy. Also, homesweet home should be home sweet home. Just how I feel. Anyway, this is great!

Keep on writing!

Thank you.



Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.
— Jamie Anderson