Before the Rooster Crows

by tgirly

Published February 24, 2012

In poem

I decided I was going to write a Christian poem/short story every day of Lent, and here's the second. Hope you enjoy!


Walking to school,
One of my younger sheep
Trips
Falls
Begins to cry.
You take no notice,
You walk on by.
What's the problem?
That's my child.

You have denied.

Before school,
The new girl comes
Wants to sit by you
But your friends put their books on the chairs,
Who wants a
Weirdo
Sitting
At your table?
I do, but
You don't.

Twice you have denied.

Time to take your math test.
Your forgot to study, so
Sneak
A peak
At your neighbor's paper.
No one will care, right?
I care.

The bell rings.
The rooster crows.
Comments & reviews · 1
User avatar
alliyah
Review
alliyah wrote a review Review · Jun 8, 2012

Ahhhhh! This didn't get any reviews? Well, it's about time someone reviewed this great poem.

The first stanza almost has a rhyme scheme, so I wish you could fit in a few more rhymy words in the rest of the poem. I would take a secound look at the secound stanza too, the phrasing is good, but the way you broke up the lines is a bit awkward. There's just something wrong with the 4th line... It's a little long, maybe you could take out the the word "but"...
As far as spelling mistakes I didn't see any. So great job!

The real beauty behind this poem is the story behind it, and how you weaved a Bible story into modern meaning. Thanks for posting.
Ta ta tip oh the hat.
~Alli-wa



When a good man is hurt, all who would be called good must suffer with him.
— Euripides