I need to write.

I love this. conversations in a writers head, or between other characters are always interesting. This one it so true. I feel like I want to write to teach things to others. I want my writing to have a purpose other than just for the fun of reading, so I can relate. Great job.
Keep it up!

Hello it is joe

My first review of the day, its a bit late but never too late to start.

Anyway great story-poem hybrid. Captures perfectly how I feel when I write. I love the part

"Thesaurus. I need the right word. Indignant? Offended? Discouraged? Disappointed?"

Perfect, just perfect. Amazing. Although I would have added confused. Although writing is the best job ever it come with its ups and downs, and this describes them perfectly.

Overall Awesmazing. (Awesome+Amazing)

Keep on writing

Just a friendly little talk with myself.

I found this to be a great piece of work and I really enjoyed this. The other voice was really nice and I thought that that was a unique thing to do. Great job! I hope that you write more in the future.

With All Do Respect
Whole Some Reader

I didn't think I was going to like this, but it ended up like that. I kind of wish you could expand on it. I understand it's supposed to be a simple back-and-forth, but I think it could solidify the piece a little more if you really went all out and turned this into a kind of story. I don't mean, "once upon a time" you know, real generic kind of stuff, but I mean, really giving me an idea of who is having this conversation. Give me a little bit of the significance behind it. You're a writer, after all, play with words and structure to make a solid piece of architecture. I feel like you've made a skeleton of a thing here, but I'm looking for the painted walls, the furniture, the personality.

That being said, I still liked it an awful lot.

Hello,
I really like what you did with your poem. To me the italicized words are like your mind trying to help you sort out how you feel and what you will do. Its also quite easy to relate too and its quite powerful. It really made me think of how I feel at times and how I process it. One of my favorite things was when you wrote about the emotions because that is what a lot of my friends and I feel, that huge mix of emotions. All in all great job! ^-^

Hi there!

I thought that the poem was incredibly powerful in that it is very relatable for the average person. After all, everyone has gone through the emotions the poem expresses I also really thought it was cool that this poem could be interpreted in many different ways (at least to me)--the narrator could be arguing with themselves, having a conversation with another person, or how humanity collectively feels regarding each other ("Because they don't understand"). Lastly, the font made it easier, in my opinion, to distinguish the two voices in the poem. Overall, it was a really great poem!

Keep writing!

I like the idea of a somewhat second personality or person in this poem, it really brings out the point of this poem more. The only real problem with the whole thing really was when you wrote "word" I know you really meant to say "world" but you might want to fix that for others or in their reviews that's all you're really going to hear about.


I wish the whole word could see what I know!

Do you know?

Yes. No. Sometimes.

You have doubts.

Your poem expresses people's conflicting thoughts. It's seems like this person was talking to a therapist. I think the person whose text is in the italicized font sounds like a therapist, and I don't think that they are listening to the other person very well. They are just giving them thoughts that the person thinks is his or her own. The font confused me a little... I thought that there was going to be an interview. Nonetheless, this was a good poem. Keep writing!

'Thesaurus. I need the right word. Indignant? Offended? Discouraged? Disappointed?'
I think this line tells how the person who the poem is about is feeling.
I like how the person and their mind are two different people and the mind is sort of clueless to what the person's problem is.
Its a good thing that the different person's dialogue is in different font otherwise it would of been hard to tell between the two people.

Hah, wow you really caught my mood today Cailey! Are you stalking my mind O.o

First: I really like how you wrote this, as a conversation between these two people/ parts of one person . . . however I can only tell you for sure that it's more like a script than a piece of poetry. You have it wrongly labeled there, I do believe.

If I wasn't unsure of myself I'd probably say that this was a conversation between a person and Yaweh (it reminds me of a whole lot of mine, for sure!). If that's what it is then impressive job: The guy even started rambling a bit without listening to the other voice (something I do a LOT!). If it isn't . . . then cool coincidence.

Anyway, this is really more of a literary comment than a review (but I'm posting it as one anyway ). Awesome job, intentions neglected, you made my day!


~Black~

hey!

first i will start my review from a positive note.....your poem is good, very understandable, very still, very quiescent. i like your rhythm also, very mellifluous. your questionings are also interesting. you have crafted your poem very well. it suits with your genre.

now some negative points.....your poem is sounding like an interview. as if some anonymous guy taking an interview. ending of this poem is disturbing.. you should work on your ending.

overall no more negative points for your beautiful and innovative poetry. i like innovations in this field. and also i like the innovators most. i like your innovation your poetic style is great.

keep writing ! good!

I really love the style of this poem. The conversational tone really emphasises the struggle between the two voices. One is desperate and the other is like a friend, a voice of reason who is there to help.

It is a good attempt at a free-verse poem I really like it and the questions it asks. My only criticism is that you use full stops more than you should. I realise that it is for dramatic effect, but it would make it seem like a train of thought if you used more commas, which will complement the conversational tone.

Overall I liked it and keep writing