Fear

As you are getting back into writing regularly I am getting back into reviewing poetry. So please bear with me and my short unworthy review. Anyhow honestly the first stanza of this isn't my favorite, but I'll start with it. I don't like it as much because you were so literal. We are all scared of those types of things yes murder, rape, assault, and so on, but there are so much deeper things that people are afraid of in their relationships. People are afraid of being heard, being successful, being unwanted and so much more. I think you could get a lot more emotion out of the poem if you talked about those things instead just because they are so much closer to us than getting killed. Though I did like your imagery.

The second stanza, in my opinion, is a lot better. First, your rhymes seem to flow a bit more easily. But I also loved the way you described fear like it had a personality. I like how you almost went through the stages of fear. First when you say, "it knows what you knew" I think of how fear makes you unsure of things that you would have stood by before and then in the next line you describe how because of your doubt you don't defend people or stick up for yourself. Then you talk about how it slowly takes over your mind and it is all you can think about even if it is unconsciously. I think you should expand on this part of the poem and give even more information on each step.

Well, I hope I helped,

Calli

Very true. I really enjoyed the poem itself, but I feel like it didn't really have a full handle on the true feeling of fear. That moment of panic that seizes you in your darkest moments. It does however, have a handle on that lurking sense of fear that tortures so many people in their own way. Good job!

This reminded me of Apocalypto for some reason unknown to me, well because when Jaguar paw is with his father and they hear something in the bushes or whatever the father tells him to relax then some people whose village was attacked just want to pass by and they look ready to piss their pants after they leave the father takes jaguar paw to talk and he says "Did you see the disease?" Jaguar paw says "What disease?" the dad says "They were infected with it." What's this disease? it was FEAR. Fear can really mess you up he tells him to never let fear come in the way, and then he realizes he is very scared but then again who wouldn't be right? so I don't know for some reason this reminded me of that scene it's a very good write!