Drowning in
myself. Lost
to the arsenal of the dark.
Lost until her fingers
find my cheek.
Found by the brightest spark.
The grace of a
thousand angels,
youth imperishable to the years
we yearn to
spend together.
She leans close, whispers in my ear
“I love
you, so much.”
Fallen to the arrows of Cupid,
fallen to
her arms as such.
In our hearts the affection grows.
I once laid with
her,
and sought so much to be with her
my limbs cocooned her
body.
I relished it, lamented after.
She has seen my
tears;
she has taken my hand, led me on
expeditions as far as
my heart expected.
My heart expected the unexpected.
I am
found.
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139,597 Literary Works • 672,615 Reviews
Hey.
The imagery of the poem is great at engaging me to read on.
The words used we great though you happen to sometimes repeat words a lot.
There could be more added as I found I wanted to keep on reading but couldn't.
All in all a great poem.
Thanks Zexal
Hey it's caitie.
I just wanted to say that I love this poem and that everything you said fit perfectly together. I love the story in this and all the emotions that come with it. I really wish is was longer because I just wanted to keep reading. All in all this was an amazing poem. I hope I get to read more of your work soon. Bye!
Thank you so much
Wow - so amazing. It flowed perfectly, the structure helped and the line length was good but overall I think it was your language.
You conveyed your emotions amazingly - there was so much passion in the verses - that was really good. Although love is such a cliché topic to write poems about - this poem surprised me in the depth and rawness that it conveyed this theme.
the "yearning" you have for "her" in this poem is also conveyed really deeply - so many people can relate to this.
I also love how you ended with "I am found" and began with "lost" - It's great to show the progression of the poem, but also to put across the point that even though she's "taken" your heart, you are still found - it was amazing.
Anyway, sorry about this rubbish review, I basically just wanted to say that your poem was amazing and I can't wait to read more of your work. Well done.
Tick tock
Thanks tick tock - either you really understood what I was doing (which you did) or you just flattered my ego so much it's all I can say :') Thanks so much!
Thank you! No worries
I love the catching description line. The poem that followed was not a let down. My only critique would be to stick with one tense. You sort of jumped all over the place. With "has seen" to "expected" to "am found," I didn't really know if you're talking about present emotions or past emotions. You also had a faint rhyme scheme going in the beginning that was lost. I love that this person, this muse you speak of, clearly brings you out of some hole. I can feel it. Good job. Can't wait to see more.
Thank you Caitlynn, I appreciate your thoughts
Hi!!
This piece was quite interesting and I thoroughly enjoyed it. As a reader, the word lost was a little redundant in the first stanza, and the last line of the poem seems a little out of place. I understand the meaning and how you got to that line, but I think it breaks the flow of the poem. I love the imagery and description you have placed within this poem, and I think the length is excellent.
Keep up the great writing,
Tiffany
Thanks Tiff, I appreciate the review
I know. I was worried about the last line too, but I like the way it breaks the flow, I think it's a good way to finish 
I'm definitely taking out the first 'lost' though, thanks!