Young Writers Society

Hello, Artemis! Wolf here for a review.

You're making this so much harder than it should be xD Of course this was a shorter part than the rest, but it was still great. I'm curious to find out more on what the witches didc, or why they did it. Sure they're upset with Billie, but she can't be the only reason, can she? The ending line from Thea is great, it gives us an ominous feeling.

So, I notice now that Thea and Iris are trying to include Billie more, and I recall last chapter that Billie said they were scared what would happen to them if they ignored her. It makes sense, but I can really feel it here.

Another thing is I notice there are a lot of characters, which of course makes sense because its an enormous school! But I'm really glad that we're getting more of a look into them. Of course Lucian we've been learning tons about, but Iris has never really spoke until recently, and Thea was a jerk. Just listening to them talk is nice, and it's interesting to hear their voices.

There's a lot of wondering for me right now. I'm wondering what Lucian's planning, what Artemis will do, what the heck is up with Sedna. You're doing a great job leading me along with enough bait that I don't lose interest, but not too much as I get bored. Sorry not much critique here, but your writing has improved so much. And there are asterisks! Yay! Anywho, onward! Happy Review Day and Keep Writing,
~Wolfare~

Next review for this review day! Ugh I still have two chapters after this one.

This is kind of a filler chapter. It's great tho!!

I loved your new divider thing!!! Perfect. Just what you've needed for the past couple chapters.

*************** Haha

Oh no I remember she was drinking that "faerie elixir" not good. But why didn't it hurt her? Is she not even fey?? I think she is some type of cross race!!! Like she's not really a fey but something else, something better.

Yep that's the theory.

Officially.

Ok so this was a short chapter so short review sorry. :/

This revieeeew waas brought to yoooou in paart byy::::

Wiiicked Squiiids andd company

Hey!

I felt bad for knocking you off the first place, so I thought I'd give you a review to make up for it before I retire for the day.

Specifics

1. Lovely first sentence - it sets the scene well and gives us the character's current emotional state while also being a bit funny. Good job.

2.

“You can do that?” I blink.“Track someone?”

“Guess it slipped their minds,” I mutter.

His FACE TIGHTENS questioningly.

“I suppose…a lot of students travel to the capitol for the diversity festival, you could come with me. Then we'll figure out something else.”

My chest tightens.“You mean with your family?”

I don’t move. My heart flutters at the idea, and I want to punch it. There’s some reason I shouldn’t do this, but my thoughts are too jumbled and TIRED,