A bleary vision;
watching the after-rain settle in.
A hazy misting,
soaking greedily into our fabrics.
My child asks me a question,
“Why does the flower cry?”
It is water-kissed
in the hands of my child.
Our eyes search the plucked flower,
and one another
for just a twinkling.
“It does not cry,
but lets the rain rest on its body.”
A boundless parade;
breathing in be-sprinkled earth.
A regular display;
twining digits for warmth.
“I love you.”
Conveyed with a delighted cadence.
“I love you, too.”
Even lies have reasons.
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140,085 Literary Works • 672,996 Reviews
Hello there! I must sat I really liked this! I agree with others comments saying you have good imagination put into this! This is quite creative. I had the images in my head as I was reading this. I also like your word choices. So nothing bad to say here. Keep up the good work XD
Hey, i have to say that i really like this poem. You have some very great imagination put into this, and i for one appreciate that. The flow is easy to interpret and the emotion was clearly their. The whole interpretation is fenomenal and i found it quite easy to get a clear image in my head. i would advise you to keep on writing and i look forward to reading more
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Good Work,
Porter
Hi,
This is really beautiful. I love your imagery, especially "A boundless parade".
It flows easily and the dialogue is a great touch, it really brings this to life.
The last line is very surprising and effective.
I'd change "“I love you.”
Conveyed with a delighted cadence."
to
"'I love you,"
conveyed with a delighted cadence."
Other than that I think that this is perfect.
Hope this helps,
Jas