Drowning.

You are so talented! *Likes this poem*

Your poem used great imagery to express your emotions. You did a great job sticking to your rhyme and not having it be forced or stretched. Your poem had a great meter, too. I especially loved the part, "Saying there was a sense of humanity,/that I seem to lack./And if I had a heart,/It would be pitch black./Should I pretend to care,/while you list the qualities I lack?"

The only mistakes I found were very minor. "My worlds fading away," should be, "My world's fading away." "Im trying to recall the last time," should be, "I'm trying to recall the last time." "Isnt my fate," should be, "Isn't my fate."

Those were the only mistakes I found. Excellent job!

This is very good. ^_^ it's written well, and it's

It's clever how you talk about drowning, and how it feels like to have someone turn their back on you, after they've said all these terrible, hyporcrtical things. the Way you've worded it is awesome, and I'm glad I got to read something so cool.

A couple of grammar mistakes here and there, like "it's to late," should be "it's too late," and isnt and Im should be "Isn't," and "I'm," but other than that, it's really good. (sorry to nitpick, but I have to make sure I have some kind of criticism, or else this can't really be a review, right. XD )

Thank you for posting something so wicked, and I hope you have a nice day! ^_^

"Claps" "Pats on Back" Great job! You can write your emotions very nicely while many other aren't very good at it.

this four lines are fantastically written.

"Saying there was a sense of humanity,

that I seem to lack.

And if I had a heart,

It would be pitch black."

actually the whole one is. the way at first you described sadness and the broken emotions and at last, you did a come back, saying that,

"And that you won’t rest until,

my heart is on your plate.

Being part of your menu,

Isnt my fate."

and these--

"You see,

I’m about ready to break.

And on that day you’ll get to see,

what the gates of hell hold back.

Because my inner demons are ready to come back."

you did write it very well. it was a pleasant reading.

Thank you. May the Almighty bless you.

Like Baidirai said,

every time I see a good writing, it's always by you!

Great job!!

My favorite is the ending!!

Keep writing,

~Tiff

Here to review! ^-^

Every time I see something good, it's by you. Once again, an amazing job. I can pretty much just say what I did last time, cause it's sooo good. I love reading a poem that I can actually sing. It means it's done very well. It strikes me on many emotional levels. Thank you.