Young Writers Society

Hello dear!

This poem is exteremley beautiful. Even without a traditional rhyme scheme, it still seems so lyrical. The subject of flower meanings is so incredibley complex that it could be a language all in its own. You weave that language so fluidly into the normal english of the story. I feel as though you but a ton of research and thought into the meanings of each flower you incorperated into the poem.

I feel as though my one probelm is that it seems to start in the middle of a poem. I don't know if that makes sense, but it just doesn't feel like a beginning stanza, but one you'd find in the middle. It is still a really amazingly constructed line, it jusy feels rather rushed.

But again that is only one criticism I seem to have for this and I think that's great. I'm so glad you decided to share this with us. I cannot wait to read more of your work later. Please keep writing!

Hi, Anne,

What an intriguing concept. I know I've always found a little interest in knowing the "meaning" of flowers or even the particular color of flowers, so I feel like I'm giving the right one. That said, I -- personally, keep in mind! maybe not everyone feels the same way -- feel that this poem goes too far with it. Especially with such a gorgeous opening stanza that doesn't have anything to do with the flower meanings.

And I'll explain a bit to support my side: I can't read through this poem without the translation you've included at the bottom. Because I don't know what it means by "a field of begonias". At first, I take begonia as a general flower, but then you keep naming different flowers and with the meanings translated at the bottom, I realize they're supposed to describe specific things rather than general flower things. This means that each time I come across another flower name, I'm taken out of the flow of the poem to check the meaning, and I end up feeling like I'm cross checking a dictionary rather than reading a poem. None of the joy ends up sticking with me.

Still, the poem that is free of this translation fest is really intriguing -- "flowers aren't meant/ to despise their petals". You have an idea that I feel is fresh and intriguing, and I'd like to see a more accessible poem written about it!

I hope this review can be helpful to you in some way. Please reply or message me if you have any questions or comments. Thanks for sharing,

Hannah

Hi! herbgirl for a review here!
To start off, this poem was a good idea. The way you compared this girl to flowers, while incorporating the flower "meanings" was very creative, and I liked it. I feel as though girls are often compared to flowers, but never in a way that praises more than their appearance. For this effort towards a different comparison, I commend you.
However, while I liked the idea, I feel it could have been executed better. I noticed that you had at least one flower in each stanza, except the first one. While I did really like the first stanza, it pulled me in, I think it would be better and add more fluidity to the poem if this stanza also had a flower in it, perhaps something to do with the alluring bit.
I really liked the second stanza, much like the first one. It took me a second to understand, but after rereading it I got that you were trying to say she thought deeply, but those after didn't care. I thought that was very well done!
The third stanza, however, I don't really understand. If she has a healing heart, why would it be hating her reflection? Perhaps this is just a thing that bothers me, and makes sense to other people, but I thought this was rather unclear. I liked the fourth stanza, it was very poetic. No
criticisms there.
I thought the last stanza was an interesting sentiment. It really ties the poem together, in my opinion, although I would suggest possibly adding one final stanza to tie in the first two stanzas, about others attraction to her. Still, very nice and poetic.
Anyways, I really liked this poem! It was well thought out and poetic, with good imagery.
Thanks for the read,
herbgirl