spare me

King here

Surely I will say nothing new to your ears but I really love this work and just wanted to tell you that this work is so relatable that it could not be. Each line directly hits the reader, even more if it is a writer, and shows them the exact scenery when they try to write something but they can not come to write it. The poetry is short but I think it is long enough even if there are many questions that I can ask which are connected with each line in this work.

I love the 'needle threading through skin' line which is a very good comparison for the writers block situation. I would never thing of using the crossed out lines in such a way even if I use them in my reviews times to times.

I think that the first lines are the ones who catches the eye of the reader because you talk to us but I do not think the other next lines would sound so cathy as first lines so the order of the lines is perfect. Anyways, have a good day and keep on writing!

Hello! I just wanted to say I enjoyed this poem. The simplicity is refreshing and the message is direct. Sometimes I find that people will try to overcomplicate a poem with obnoxiously complex words, or long drawn out lines, but you kept it nice and clean. Sometimes it's better to get across a meaning or message in fewer words because it makes a bigger impact, and that's what you did here. Any writer could relate to this poem.
The structure isn't completely sound, and some people may critique that. Personally, I like the way the poem reads, and I wouldn't change the structure.
Perhaps the line "doubt, guilt, sadness, and pain" could be restructured a bit differently. Also, maybe change "threading" to "threaded." It might read better. Also, I would capitalize "the 'i' in "Ink" in your first line, unless you purposely wanted the whole poem to be in lowercase to emphasize the understated aesthetic of this piece. In that case just leave it be. Otherwise I don't think you need to change up much!

Happy writing!

Kali L.

Ay.

Your first four lines really set all the scene I need for the remainder, honestly. It's a poem directed at writers and, while the first four lines lack much power because of the basic choice of descriptors, it works as a whole exposition because it's universal for writer frustration.

If I had it my way, I'd produce this in image format where I could modify by tablet and hand-scratch through 'crossed-out words' for bonus effect just for aesthetic pleasure, but I was born on the internet in the early 90s and am tired of direct [s] code.

So I praised your first four lines (vaguely). The next three really just serve to pile atop what's already served, which begs the question why. You feel those feels because of the human condition--it's not a question to be asked, and it's nothing anyone won't already know, so why reiterate? The placement is the issue because you deliver everything at once in such a small space and it's heavy on dissatisfaction. Your soul being etched into them, arguably less so, but it's still overdone and akin to eating a lone stick of celery unadorned when you have more food in the apartment. It gets you through, but why choose a bland life?

More praise for the needle threading through skin. Decent and relatively underused with the exception of suture imagery in any medical scene ever (and loooord I love suture scenes).

The last two lines had better apply to the narrator herself because that's ultimately where our prime frustration comes from. Crumble should be crumple. Simple mistake.

Short piece, short review. Cut, burn, regrow. Let me know upon future edits.
Ty

I like the subject of the poem, about the struggle of writing. However I wouldn't have known it was about writing emotions unless I read the description so I think that could be made more apparent. I like the first three lines, they build the ideas of the poem in a more subtle way than just a statement would.

I don't think it was necessary to use "words" twice, and both times it is at the end of the line which doesn't sound good, it really interrupts the flow to hear it twice. On the fifth line I think the listing format gets a bit old, something new would prevent the poem from starting to get stale here. Now I'm not sure if you meant to use a different word anywhere in 6 and 7 but I cannot for the life of me figure out what it means to etch something like a needle threading through skin. Finally I think you meant to use the word crumple because crumble doesn't seem right.