12+ Mature Content

The Joy of Pain

There is coolness
The blade brings.
Helps you push
Past the painful things.
 
There is pleasure
In the crimson red.
It provides clarity
In your muddled head
 
There is control
In each pass.
You can determine
How long it lasts.
 
There is freedom
As the blood flows,
But it is only your freedom
For nobody can know.
Comments & reviews · 8
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OceanGirl
Comment

Its an amazing piece! I totally enjoyed reading this poem and the flow of the poem is good and the vocabulary used is again good! the beginning of the poem i.e. starting is amazing.
anyway,
Keep up the good work!
All the best!

Wow this is crazy. I really hope this isn't how you truly feel and if it is cut out who or what ever makes you feel like this. Keep writing so I can review more. If you need any ideas let me know. If have lots of ideas but none I could write like yours.

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glovegg
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I truly loved this poem. Its a great sixteen sentences that is very easy to relate to. I would give you a review but its hard to find words to criticize. :) Can't wait to read more from you!!
Little Storm Writer, GG

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Hanorah
Review
Hanorah wrote a review · Mon Jun 17, 2013 8:16 pm

Hi aouther2b!
I'm hanorah and I will be reviewing your poem 'the joy of pain' today ;).
First of all,I would like to say well done on this poem.Your use of words is really great.
I loved this poem and liked reading it,the flow of the poem was good,you had capitals at the start of each sentence and many people would be able to relate to this.the only constructive critism I had was that you should use punctuation,but apart from that it was great ;). I would give it a 10/10.Keep writing!

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smile123
Comment

Really good use of words. Also great use of capitals. Excellent layout and structure of the poem. Loving the ryming techniques and good puntuation. Your an excellent writter and poet. Please post more fantastic poems :)

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itsLayal
Review

I can really relate to that i truly love this.

Its really sad but it inspires me and i liked the part where its like

" There is freedom
As the blood flows
But it is only your freedom
For nobody can know "

Because it really describes how it feels like.

great work, keep it up!

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Innergy
Comment

This is soulful poetry in my opinion. I like how each stanza compliments the last. The beginning was perfectly written, because it sparked that spark that you really need in order to convey the emotion in it. This was very well written.

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Sarrasponda
Comment

Wow that's amazing you completely captured the message! What a great job, it's really well done.



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