Death laughed
Right in Life’s face
Knowing just who
Would win this race.
Reaching his cloaked hand
To touch Life’s arm
Death spoke,
His voice dripping with charm
“Oh, Life you tease
Poor innocent souls
Letting them believe
They’re in control.
I may remind them
Of what is soon to come
But I also provide comfort
When, from you, there is none.
I am an enmity
For those filled with hate
But I’m also a liberator
For those who dwell in mistakes.
I hold no judgement
For those who cause loss.
I give comfort to
Those who forgot
Those who have forgotten
How to move on,
How to let go
When something is gone.
Though I’m a whisper,
With lingering presence
People come to me
With their repentance.
People beg you
To leave them be
As I said before,
People come to me to be free."
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Pandabear7 here to do a lovely review. Well I have to say this is very...interesting. The title definitely caught my attention. I like things about death, ghosts, etc. I think the structure is really good too! Keep up the good work, I'd like to see more!
This poem I liked but you kinda lost me near the end. The beginning was really good it captured my attention and gave me a chill. Near the end I started to fade out I don't no why but you just lost me. I feel like you could keep going and add more to the poem.
I have actually written a piece just like this but it's a conversation from Lucifer to God.
But to your poem. I love the physical structure, how you separated each stanza. It adds to the effect that it's a conversation even though I don't know how it does that XD.
Your idea that Death is the sympathetic one is intriguing yet quite spine-tingling. Most people just believe that life is the only good thing, but Death is also welcoming to many other be it from depression or an illness that is slowly killing them anyways.
I commend you on this thought-provoking piece, takes guts to write something like this as many think of it, but don't know how to phrase it.
This is such an intriguing piece. I really appreciate the untrusting tone set by the structure of the poem. The shape of poems can change the reader's outlook on the whole poem. This time, it worked really well. I have to commend you on your brilliant observations of life and death, also. You personified them in a very relatable way. Nice work:)
Hi! Infinity here,

I'd just like to commend you greatly for this piece of work! Wow it's a very thought provoking poem, I also like the way you have portrayed death, like death is in a sense more real than life, the sad and honest reality. You've taken life and death through a very clever path and have written it in a way so simple yet wonderful! well done
Keep up the good writing!
-Infinity
WHOA 0.o I just going to say this right out: This makes me think that Death is talking about suicide... Is that what he's talking about? My heart's thumping with fear right now. I never new that Death would be perceived that way, honestly. I always thought that Life meant new beginnings and Death meant closure.
This creeped the hell out of me.
But I liked it and STILL want more. This is an incredible piece of work.
With All Do Respect
Whole Some Reader
To answer your question, yes he is talking about suicide. I felt that it would be good for Death to remind Life that people can want death over life sometimes. Life can me new beginnings but not always. I thought it might be fun and intresting to explore that aspect.
Very good order of words! I like the way the words string together.
Very well done!