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137,562 Literary Works • 672,043 Reviews
That was awesome it started out like a happy poem and ended rather dramatic, defenitly one of those poems that glues you to read even more! It almost brings chills! I'm a fan of dark poetry and your putts it over the top for it being bright and happy then dark! you have talent just ask and i will reveiw any more of your poetry! There is'nt anything i dont like i trully love it all! keep up the good work
yours trully - WRITINGNEON
Hi, overall this poem is not bad. Firstly, these corrections must be made;
"it starts a stressed chain of thought"- the 'i' there should be capitalized a 's' after thought to denote plurality of the word.
The poem is kind of confusing, at first thought, the reader thinks the thing once started and cannot stop is the writers fear of monsters, and then the last stanza talks of an obsession, maybe with the thought of monsters i do not know and falling-the last stanza did not just connect with the rest of the stanzas.
But you did a good Job.