I want quiet
Not silence
I want peace,
Not discomfort.
I want music,
Not arguments.
I want all my time,
Not just some of yours.
Controlling yet submissive,
I want to please.
Scared yet brave,
I want to stand out.
Pushy yet needy,
I want to be loved.
Alone yet not lonely,
I want to be alone, not feel lonely.
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139,865 Literary Works • 672,779 Reviews
I love this Poem! Good job Rascalover! I can easily relate to this. Your contrasts are really good. I love every single word of this poem. I especially love the part,"I want music, Not arguments." This is very true. There are many times when I feel exactly this and I think you did a great job of explaining this. My favorite line, however, is, "Scared yet brave, I want to stand out." I have dealt with this feeling and I didn't know how to say it. I didn't know what I was feeling. You explained it perfectly. Amazing poem!
I'm glad the lines gave you clarity
thanks for giving my work purpose!
There's such a deeper meaning beneath the words, contrasting our needs to sometimes the outcome, which is both refreshing and so true! Moreover, there's also reference to some outcomes that happen due to unawareness, like the line "pushy yet needy". The best thing is though, is that this is just my interpretation- when in actual fact, people can empathise with this in so many ways!
Great work!
Z x
Wow.
That is really all I can say about this poem.
When we say one thing, many people would perceive it as another thing. If we said we want 'quiet', many people would automatically think we need everyone to automatically stay silent and leave us alone. But really, we just want to be able to find peace within ourselves.
The message you are conveying is pretty relatable to many, if not all, of us in this world. The tone and flow is really on point and I applaud you for it.
Overall, this was an enjoyable read and I sincerely hope to see more from you in the near future.
Your title and your last statement are contradicting.
Hey there! Rain here for a quick review. I'm not the best at reviewing poetry, but I'm going to try today for your lovely poem here~
I found this to be very relatable, especially the title/last sentence! I love the two words "lonely" and "alone" and the major difference between them. I thought you executed this poem in the right direction, and I loved this basis you took it off on
Now, I know in poetry punctuation/capitalization is totally up to the writer, but I actually think punctuation would strengthen this poem and benefit it in a way. I just feel as if it needs that extra boost! Of course, this is totally up to you -- I don't want to be pushing you to do this because I'm aware this is completely a choice.
I'm not quite sure what this line is describing? I'm assuming it goes along with the 'time' part, but it's not entirely clear and since the rest of the poem is so clear and straightforward, I think this needs some backing up. Or - does it just go along with the three lines below it? In that case, you should capitalize the 'C' in controlling.
I feel as if this poem could become stronger if the poem connects more to the readers? I love the concept and I can see it as being very relatable (it already is) but adding more emotion-filled words and phrases would build a stronger connected. This may disrupt the nice fashion and format you have here, but you may find a way to drive from that!
Otherwise, lovely poem and great choice of words! It was short and sweet and definitely worth the read. Keep writing!
~ EternalRain ^-^