z

Young Writers Society



Sit in the Silence With me

by LUNARGIRL


Sit in the silence with me,

as I watch today pass

through cloudy eyes,

and wait for tomorrow

to see the sun rise.

...

Sit in the silence with me,

let it seep into your heart,

and creep into your soul,

and then let it swallow you whole.

...

Sit in the silence with me

as I watch the world from afar,

and let the world unfold into something new each day,

as I wait for my time to come,

 as I sit on the shelf,

unused, unloved, unwanted.

...

Sit in the silence with me,

as I watch her grow,

watch her learn,

watch her try,

watch her live,

as I stare down at her

from my spot on the shelf.

...

Sit in the silence with me,

as she becomes someone else,

who never looks up,

only stares at their screen.

...

Sit in the silence with me,

as I watch her leave,

and all I want to do it stop her

before shes gone,

and let her know I'm here,

my silent plea,

that she will never hear.

...

Sit in the silence with me,

as then the door closes one last time,

as I sit on my shelf and think about her,

of all the years we could have had together,

if she only noticed that I was here,

...

Wating, watching, listening,

as I sat in the silence,

up on her shelf,

consumed with dread,

my hope is extinguished,

my life at a end,

because I knew someone will come,

and take me away from here,

take me away from her.

...

So I sit in silence,

up on her shelf,

next to the blank space,

where someone like me used to be,

and I watch as someone comes

to grab my small body off the shelf.

...

And I know what will happen next,

because it's the same every time,

as a woman takes me to her car,

and deposits me in the arms of a girl.

...

But she doesn't set me down,

like everyone else,

she holds me close,

and then stares into my eyes,

as promises to play with me,

and it makes me want to cry.

...

Because I now know what love is,

and what it is to be held,

to be loved and cherished,

and it makes my heart swell.

...

And as the car moves away,

my hope is reborn,

because I know this time will be different,

as I stare out the car window,

tucked in her arms,

laying against her heart,

listening to the rhythm,

and savoring every second.

...

Because I no longer sit in silence,

up on a shelf,

wishing someone would play with me,

wishing they would love me.

...

That wish has finally come true,

and I'm ready to spend every day with her,

and watch her grow,

to see where each day brings us.

And as I leave my old life behind,

I don't look back.


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65 Reviews


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Sat Mar 27, 2021 3:10 am
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pineapple321 wrote a review...



Wow!

I loved how you made readers feel almost sorry for the doll in the beginning. A writer is naturally good when the reader can feel a type of emotion in what they are reading. The poem was a whirlwind of emotions. The ending is perfect, amazing job.

I also really liked how the first 7 stanzas always began with "sit in the silence with me". Some might this it's repetitive, but I believe it was a perfect touch.

In all, great work! I hope you keep writing :)

Signed,

Pineapple




LUNARGIRL says...


Thanks for the review, glad you liked it!



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Sun Mar 21, 2021 3:29 pm
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HJYoung wrote a review...



Jeez well thats a LONG poem.
I can see that this is about unrequited love, and how you use the metaphor of a unwanted old toy on the shelf is nice. Or is it the other way around? Is this really a toy? I think i remember a story like this that was about a toy who wanted to be played with? I think that this is really good! I can see no grammatical errors or spelling errors. Overall, 10/10.




LUNARGIRL says...


Thanks for the review!



HJYoung says...


ty



HJYoung says...


why in the world are there two



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23 Reviews


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Sun Mar 21, 2021 3:18 pm
HJYoung says...



Interesting.





People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one.
— Leo J. Burke