A Feather of hope
A feather of hope can float down from the sky.
It can perch on you shoulder and say "Hi."
You can greet it with kindness, or discard it with hate.
It can come in many forms, shapes, or sizes.
.....
A kind word.
A friendly greeting.
A cure to what's killing everyone in the world.
It doesn’t matter, because to you, it’s a feather of hope.
.....
Hope, that tomorrow will be better than today.
Hope, that your friends will be okay.
Hope, keeps us sane.
Hope is what keeps us alive.
.....
Hope ignites something in the soul.
It brings light, and keeps us safe at night.
It's as light as a feather, but as strong as steel.
Hope can be as small as a feather, but it can change the world.
Points:
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Canary word: Present
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,781 Reviews
Bad line:It can come in many forms, shapes, or sizes.
Try to make an image out of this, it comes as the bear or honey. Or the owl and a rat.
Love it!
Thanks!
Hi! I'm here for your THIRD review! (Haha, that's so selfless of me, right? SO NOBLE!)
It is a bit of bad language use, but I would add "Then" before ""Hi"" so the rhythm is connected.
Did you mistype it here? because your rhyme in the third line is not at the end of the third line. It should probably be: "You can discard it with hate or greet it with kindness. It can come in many forms, shapes, or sizes."
. . .
All the commas after the "Hope"s in the third stanza are unneeded.
. . .
Nothing else wrong with this poem! It was great!
Hope you were satisfied with this review!
-Yoshi
Hello there,
I saw your poem's title and came for a read. I always love poems about hope and this is beautifully written! It most certainly rings true. Each of the poem's four stanzas carries so much meaning and strength; I really like the word choice too. Lines like, "It's as light as a feather, but as strong as steel" or "Hope, keeps us sane. Hope is what keeps us alive" have a profound impact on the reader.
The analogy of hope being like a feather is perfect, and I enjoyed picturing it in my mind. One of my favorite lines was "Hope ignites something in the soul." Your words and descriptions were thoughtful and grammatically - this poem looks great!
Nice work crafting your poem!
It has a brilliant message and I enjoyed reading it.
~Spider~
Thanks so much for the review!
Hi LUNARGIRL ! This is a great poem! I could go on and on about how great it is, but that's your teacher's job
I'm just going to give a tidbit of feedback.
I don't know what you're going for, but this doesn't really rhyme.
The last sentence in that quote doesn't really make sense, so you may want to elaborate. Again, this could be totally fine, I don't know the criteria, and it's a great poem, just look back at those things and see if you could make this more clear.
You've got a lot of great rhymes, the last paragraph, not as much, but if you want to leave that, that's fine. This poem is really great, love the idea of materializing hope.
This part made me laugh, the night part..
Love this part..it's amazing. Powerful, simple, great way to end on a high note.
Great job, LUNARGIRL - this is a really great piece of work, and you might get a PM from me if I have a poetry unit
Keep writing!
-Soccer23
Thanks so much for the review!
Sure!